


Traveling Buddies

by jurassicplant



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Road Trip, Alternate Universe - Teenagers, M/M, Teen Castiel (Supernatural), Teen Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:09:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 21,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27715909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jurassicplant/pseuds/jurassicplant
Summary: Dean Winchester decides to run away from home and take a train as far as he can go. Castiel Novak decides on the same thing. What will happen when fate pushes together, but society tries to pull them apart?
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 14





	1. All Aboard

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this back in 2018 and really always loved it, but after the way the series ended I feel like I needed to revisit this. I hope you enjoy it!

Dean Winchester stepped onto the train, with nothing but a backpack and his ticket, that he now handed to the stewardess.

“You’ll be in seat 25A.” The stewardess said, pointing to somewhere vaguely down by the end of the train. Dean nodded and passed her on his way down to the end of the train.

He walked past seats 22, 23, and 24 before realizing that his seat was at the very back of the train car. It was also the last train car, making him the caboose of the caboose.

“Oh, great.” Dean said when he saw his seat. There was nothing wrong with the seat itself, except for that he was next to someone, and in an aisle seat. The only two things Dean wanted on this train ride was to sit alone and have a window seat. And apparently, he wasn’t getting either.

Dean slid into his seat and put his backpack on his lap. He glanced at the guy sitting next to him. Dean couldn’t see the kid’s face, but he seemed to about 16 or 17, so around Dean’s age. He was wearing a beige trench coat, which is strange for a teenager on a train ride. He was looking out the window, almost like a depressed kid that would be in an angsty music video. Considering he had headphones in, he probably was pretending to be in an angsty music video.

Dean turned his attention away from the mysterious trench coat kid and to his backpack contents. All he had was a couple changes of clothes, a cell phone that only his younger brother Sam could reach, and his dad’s wallet, which he made sure to fill full of cash before he left for the train station. There had to be at least a couple hundred dollars in there, enough to get him to a new place. A new life. Also in the wallet was a few fake IDs too, which Dean made sure to hide from the kid next to him.

The stewardess told everyone to remain seated for the next 5 minutes as the train was about to begin moving. Dean sat back in his seat, and waited for the lurch of the train that was about to carry him from a crappy life, to one that was hopefully better.

The train started moving. It was slow at first, but then it sped up continually until it was moving considerably.

Since Dean was in the caboose of the caboose, he could look out the very end of the train, which had a window on it. He gazed out it, watching as he drew further from the city he knew his whole life. Lawrence, Kansas kept getting farther and farther away.

Dean Winchester was finally free.


	2. Meeting Cas

It had been 2 hours since Dean boarded the train. Earbud kid had stayed in his seat, not saying a thing. Only letting out a deep sigh occasionally.

Dean hadn’t really done anything too. After Lawrence was no longer in sight, he checked his phone every once in a while, rechecked his money, and waited. He had been on longer trips than this, but at least the whole time he could talk to his little brother. Even though Dean was free now, he was also very alone.

Another hour passed. The train stopped at another station, some people getting on and some people getting off. Dean was going to take this train as far as it could carry him. Considering earbud kid never even flinched when the train stopped, Dean figured he was doing the same.

Dean wanted to start a conversation with this kid, he really did. It was lonely on this train, it would be nice to be able to talk to someone. Dean glanced over at the earbud kid, deciding whether to talk or not, but he noticed that earbud kid was slumped over differently than he usually was. Earbud kid was asleep.

_ “Maybe he needs the sleep.”  _ Dean thought.  _ “He’s probably exhausted… but what if he misses his stop? I better wake him up, just in case.” _

Dean reached over and put his hand on earbud kid’s shoulder. “Hey, buddy, time to get up!” Dean said, shaking him slightly.

Earbud kid woke up, shaking his head a little bit. He pulled the earbuds out of his ears. He glanced over at Dean, and this was the first time Dean had seen earbud kid’s face.

Earbud kid was… well… attractive. He had a little bit of stubble on his face, and his jaw could cut glass. His hair was a dark brown, that was slightly ruffled from his train nap. But his eyes. Dean couldn’t help but stare at his eyes. They were blue, the color of the sky, yet they held all the depth of the ocean. 

There was no denying that this earbud kid was pretty attractive, even for a boy.

“Oh, thank you. I guess I just kind of dozed off.” Earbud kid said. His voice was low and gruff, but still calming in its essence.

“So, uh…hi.” Dean said, unsure of what to say. He wanted to start conversation, but how would you do that with someone you met on a train? He figured that a name is usually a good starting point. “I’m Dean Winchester.”

“Cas Novak.” Earbud kid replied. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Cas.” Dean said. Dean really liked that name, the way it rolls off the tongue.  _ Cas. _

“As to you, Dean.” Cas said. “I wasn’t really paying attention for the trip, where are we at?”

Dean glanced out the window. “It looks like we’re in Topeka.”

“Topeka, as in Kansas?” Cas asked.

“Yep.” Dean said, confused as to why Cas was confused. “Why, where are you from?”

“Illinois.” Cas said, glancing back out the window.

“Holy crap, dude!” Dean said. “You’re super far from home.”

Cas turned back to Dean. He gave Dean a bit of a smirk, a mischievous smile. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

Dean was right. This kid was running away from home too. “It’s definitely not a bad thing. I’m doing the same thing.” Dean said.

Cas seemed surprised, but pleased that Dean was in the same boat as him. “Really?”

“Hell yeah!” Dean said, finally feeling like he was making a friend in this world. “So, what made you want to leave?”

Cas turned from looking very happy and excited that he made a new friend, into looking sad. He turned out the window, gazing the same way he did when Dean first saw him. Cas completely shut down, being silent when just a moment ago he was bubbling with words.

Dean didn’t know what to do. Should he let Cas be, which would return them to the silence they had shared before?

Dean gave Cas a minute or two, and then Dean put his hand on Cas’s shoulder. It seemed to startle him.

“Hey, buddy, if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay.” Dean said. “Crap happens, I would know. I promise I won’t bring it up again.”

Cas nodded in a gratuitous way. Dean got the sense that Cas had never been given this level of decency before. The way he shut down immediately made Dean think that nobody in his life respected Cas like a person. What the hell happened in this kid’s life?


	3. Knowing Cas

“So, Cas, tell me about yourself.” Dean said, continuing the conversation. “Of course, tell me whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“Well,” Cas replied, “I’m from Illinois, I turned 17 like two weeks ago, and I’m on this train to go as far as it will take me.”

Dean smiled at this kid. “Well, that’s a great amount of information to know about you.”

“What about you?” Cas asked. “What are some things about yourself?”

“Um… well I’m from Kansas, I’m also 17, I have a younger brother named Sam. And I’m also riding this train as far as it will take me.” Dean said. 

“Do you feel bad about leaving your brother at home?” Cas asked, intrigued.

Dean thought for a moment. The whole time he was building his plan to get away, he was too busy thinking and plotting and putting actions into motion that he didn’t really realize that Sam would be left home. And Dean knows better than anyone what being home alone with Dad is like. But on second thought, Dean left a couple things with Sam. Dean’s knife, which Sam has now in case things ever get nasty. Sam has an extra set of keys to the family car, an Impala, in case he ever needs to get out. And most importantly, Sam has the only number to Dean’s cell phone. Not even his dad has it. If Sam ever needs anything, he knows that he can call Dean. Hell, Sam’s had to use it a couple times before.

“Nah, I know he can take care of himself.” Dean answered. “Plus, I made sure to leave him with a couple things that will help him out.”

“Well it’s good that you care for your brother.” Cas said. “Changing the subject, how long do you think it will be until we’re on the west coast?”

“A while. I mean, we’ve been here three hours and we’ve gone about 400 miles.” Dean answered. “So, it’s going to take a while. Is that where you’re headed?”

Cas nodded, but it was more of an unsure nod. “Yeah, I guess. The west coast is just the farthest place I’ll be able to go. I don’t have anyone there, but I can make a life for myself.”

“Well, I’ll go with you.” Dean said. “You always have to use the buddy system.” Cas smiled, all while blushing like a little kid who just got noticed by their crush. Dean continued conversation. “So, how long have you been on this train?”

“About 4 days.” Cas said. “There have been three other people aside from you in that spot, but none of them have started to talk to me.”

“Were any of them creeps?” Dean asked.

“Not really. They were all basically people trying to go from one place to another, usually getting off one or two stops over.” Cas answered. “There was this one guy, though, who I’m pretty sure  _ almost _ pissed his pants in that seat. So I wouldn’t say that seat is totally clean.”

Dean stood up, looking at his seat, mortified. “Oh, hell, dude!” Dean exclaimed. “Now I don’t want to sit here! Ugh, disgusting!”

Cas laughed, and Dean decided that Cas had the best laugh he’d ever heard. Cas threw his head back as he laughed, and his smile was so wide and so genuine that Dean couldn’t help but love it.

“I’m kidding!” Cas said. “That seat should be fine, Dean.”

Dean took his seat again, feeling embarrassed that Cas was able to trick him that easily. “Well thanks for telling me that.” Dean said, trying to hide his face from Cas. “I fully expected you to never tell me about it and let me find a new seat.”

“Oh darn.” Cas said sarcastically, swinging his arm dramatically. “You’ve discovered my maniacal plan.”

“I knew it! It was all just a rouse to make me move seats!” Dean said.

“Of course it wasn’t.” Cas said, glancing at Dean. “I really like sitting next to you, Dean. I wouldn’t want you to move.”


	4. Discovering Cas

Cas and Dean rode the train for another three hours while making pleasant conversation. 

But to Dean, this conversation was more than pleasant. It was an amazing conversation. Cas had a great sense of humor, and although he was lacking in a few social skills, he made up for it all in his words.

The pair talked for hours, sharing bizarre stories of what once happened to them at their old homes.

Dean was continuing a story that he had been sharing. “-so then this kid named Michael comes along. He’s acting like he’s gonna come beat me up, so I punch him in the face. I learned that he was trying to end the fight, but he had that type of face, so I’m pretty glad I punched it.”

Cas laughed. “You know, I have a brother named Michael.” He said.

“You do?” Dean asked, being careful not to pry. “How old is he?”

“He’s 25. He moved out years ago.” Cas answered. “I have a lot of siblings, but most of them still live at home. Actually, most of them are younger than me.”

“So, who’s your favorite out of all of them?” Dean asked.

“I would have to say Gabriel.” Cas said, a little bit too quickly. Dean could definitely tell Cas had thought about this before. “He’s nineteen, and he’s one of the only ones who’s actually nice to me.”

“Oh, well I would be honored to meet this Gabriel.” Dean said.

Cas gave a little huff. “Good luck with that. He’s a bit of a trickster. He’ll probably end up pranking you before you finish introducing yourself.”

“So, how many of your siblings have moved out?” Dean asked, deciding to ride this “discovering Cas” train as long as it would take him. 

“Michael, Raphael, and Luci. I think.” Cas said. “Luci got kicked out, so I’m not sure if that qualifies as ‘move out’, but he’s definitely out of the house.”

“So exactly how many siblings do you have?” Dean said.

“A lot. I’d rather not think of all of them right now.” Cas replied, teetering dangerously close to the end of shutting down again. “In fact, I’d rather not talk about this anymore.”

Dean patted Cas on the shoulder, in a ‘no homo’ way. “That’s okay, buddy.” He said. “We’re here to get away from all our families, right?”

Cas smiled. “Yeah. No need for our families anymore. We got each other, right?”

“Right.” Dean said. “We definitely got each other.”


	5. First Night

The night had fallen, so both Dean and Cas had drifted off to sleep peacefully. The train was still moving, making stops every once in a while to let passengers board in the dead of night.

The time was 2:03 am. Dean had woken up from a nightmare. Those damn nightmares of his dad seemed to follow him everywhere. He’s free of his family and his old, crappy life. Why can’t he be free of the night terrors either?

Dean couldn’t go back to sleep. He checked his phone, not seeing any missed calls from Sam. He checked his wallet, and every dollar was still there.

There was nothing to do except try to return to his sleep, that Dean knew was going to be filled with the horrible image of his father, standing over him with that damn belt. He glanced over Cas’s seat and saw the dark sky, covering over the open fields. It was almost beautiful in the simplicity. 

As Dean was looking at the vast expanse of the sky, he realized, with a stupid grin on his face, that there was nothing stopping him from reaching happiness. At home he always put his happiness aside for the sake of little Sammy. Whenever Dean wasn’t with Sam, his dad made his life pretty damn miserable. But there was no more responsibilities with Sam, no more of his dad’s onslaughts of hatred. There was nothing that was stopping Dean from being happy.

Dean glanced at the boy sleeping so peacefully in one seat next to him. There was nothing holding him back either. Cas could achieve happiness too. In the one short day Dean has known Cas, Dean had sensed a friendship blossoming that had he had never been able to feel before. They just clicked. Dean felt like the universe pushed the two of them together, like they were meant to be friends.

_ “Maybe I can achieve happiness with him.” _ Dean thought.

Dean’s mind filled with hopes for the future. As he laid in the train seat, his leather jacket draped over his torso and his mind filled with pleasant thoughts, Dean drifted off into the first peaceful sleep he had in a long, long time.


	6. Morning

The morning came, along with a numerous amount of new passengers. It was no longer just Cas and Dean in the caboose, but it was filled with other people. The train was passing through the eastern part of Colorado, which Dean figured out looks exactly like the majority of Kansas. Just wheat fields and cows. Lots and lots of cows.

It was about 8 am, and Dean woke up from his peaceful slumber to see that Cas was already awake, listening to music on his phone.

Dean groaned as he stretched to wake himself up. “‘Morning, buddy.” Dean said, accidentally brushing his outstretched arm on Cas’s arm.

Cas pulled out his earbuds and turned to Dean. “Good morning. How did you sleep?” Cas asked.

“Pretty good, for the most part.” Dean replied.

“Well that’s good. My first night sleeping on this thing was rough. But I’ve gotten the hang of it.” Cas said.

Dean’s stomach emitted a very loud rumbling. Dean rarely went this long without eating, and his stomach was making him pay for it. “So, Cas.” Dean said. “As the more experienced traveler, I must ask where I can get some food on this goddamn train.”

Cas smiled. Jesus Christ, Dean loves that smile. It’s a slight smile, with a bit of a smirk involved. But it was a very genuine smile. It was a smile that told someone all they needed to know about Cas. That even though he’s reserved and quiet, he’s happy. He’s a real happy kid.

Dean didn’t realize he was staring until Cas started talking. “There’s a snack car. I’ll take you to it.”

“Alright, well I’m already hungry so let’s go.” Dean said, standing up from his seat. It was the first time that Dean had attempted to stand on the train, and it was a weird feeling. He could see the world flying past him, but he was standing still. Dean grabbed the seat in front of him and stepped out into the aisle. Cas, who was already comfortable walking around a moving train, stepped behind Dean into the aisle.

Dean let go of the seat in front of him and tried to take a step forward, but the movement of the train threw Dean off balance and instead of stepping forward, he fell backward.

As Dean fell back, Cas instinctively put his hands out so that he could catch Dean. One of Cas’s hands ended on the back of Dean’s shoulder, the other ended on Dean’s waist. Cas’s arms absorbed the weight of Dean, and he pushed Dean up back to a standing position. 

Dean, now standing back on his feet, could still feel where Cas’s hands were on his body. Maybe that was because Cas hadn’t let go of Dean yet. Cas noticed that he was still holding on and retracted his hands quickly.

“Sorry.” Cas said, even though in his mind he was scolding himself for not letting go.

“You’re good.” Dean said. “Thanks for catching me.”

Dean could still feel the handprints of Cas on his body. The electric shock of Cas’s touch made every nerve in Dean’s body fire at once. Dean could feel it from the tip of his fingers to the ends of his toes.

Dean hadn’t felt this way when a girl touched him in a long time. And he hadn’t felt this flutter in his stomach for a boy in a long, long time.

Dean shook his head, trying to erase the feeling from his body and all the thoughts from his mind. The last time Dean thought this way, loads of crap went down. He did not want to repeat that, even if he was hundreds of miles away from where it happened last.

“C’mon,” Cas said, “Let’s go to the food car. I’ll lead the way.”


	7. To the Snack Car

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I've made any inaccuracies about the passenger train in America, I'm very sorry. I rode it once, when I was seven and that's what I based my knowledge on.

Cas passed Dean and walked down the aisle. Dean caught a glimpse of Cas’s face as he walked past, and Dean could swear that Cas looked a little bit flustered. 

Dean, after a few shaky steps, got accustomed to the way the train moved. He followed Cas down the aisle. When they reached the end of the train car, there was a strange tunnel looking thing that lead into the next car.

There was a metal sliding door, that had a large button that read OPEN on it. Cas pressed the button and the door slid open, revealing a tiny tiny room. The room was barely 6 feet wide and 6 feet long, with accordion-style rubber on either side and a small black platform to stand on. Dean followed Cas onto the platform. Dean could feel the air blowing through the tunnel area as the train continued to chug along. Cas pressed the same OPEN button on a door that was on the other side of the platform. The door slid open and Dean followed Cas as he walked over to the next car. 

They continued down the train for another 3 cars, and at the end of one car there was a staircase leading down to under where all the passengers were. 

Cas went down the stairs and Dean followed him curiously. Lucky for Dean, it was the snack car.

“Hello, how can I help you?” A lady said, who was standing behind the counter. She was the snack lady, Dean decided.

“Hi, we’re looking for some breakfast foods, if you have them.” Cas said.

Snack lady walked down to the end of the counter and pointed at a display of pastries, muffins, yogurts, everything that was room temperature and colder that one could eat for breakfast.

“Thank you.” Cas said, glancing at all the food. Cas looked over all the food thoughtfully, taking into consideration what he could afford and what he wanted. “I think I’m going to take a chocolate chip muffin. What about you, Dean?”

Cas glanced back at Dean, who picked up more food than he knew anyone was able to eat in a lifetime. He was holding a pie in his hands, and stacked on top of the pie was candy ranging from Snickers to Skittles, from Kit-Kats to jellybeans. He held two bags of mini-donuts as well as somehow managing to hold a drink, which Cas supposed was probably filled with a sugary drink. There were at least 4 bags of chips laying on the crooks of his arms. In his mouth were two bags of beef jerky.

Dean was staring at Cas with the happiest, most idiotic grin he had ever seen, which couldn’t make Cas help but smile too.

Dean dropped all his food down on the counter, and pulled Cas’s muffin into it. “Get yourself a drink, buddy.” Dean said to Cas. “I’m paying.”

As the snack lady rung up all the food that Dean had dropped Cas walked to the back of the car and used the coffee machine to make himself a cup of coffee. He finished it up and walked to the counter as the snack lady was ringing up all of Dean’s food.

The snack lady scanned Cas’s coffee last and read out the total. “45 dollars and 53 cents. Cash or card?”

“Cash.” Dean said, pulling a fifty out from his wallet and giving it to the woman.

“Here.” The woman said, handing Dean a plastic bag. “While I get your change you may as well shovel all of your food into this bag.”

Dean and Cas worked together to get all of the food into the bag. It was a tight squeeze but they managed it. Dean said a quick goodbye to the snack lady before they walked back up the stairs and into the main train cars.


	8. A Plan

Cas and Dean were back in their seats at the end of the train car. Dean had gorged himself on so much food that he never thought he would eat again. Of course, Dean still had about half his pile left, which he decided he would either save for dinner or breakfast the next day.

“That’s really unhealthy, you know.” Cas said, looking at Dean with judgement.

“Well I’m finally on my own so I’m free to do whatever the hell I want.” Dean replied. 

“It’s still not healthy.” 

“What are you some freakin health nut?” Dean asked.

“A little.” Cas said. “I was raised in a family of health nuts so it kinda rubbed off on me.”

“Man your family seems like no fun.” Dean said.

“No fun at all.” Cas said. “Maybe that’s why I’m no fun at all.”

“C’mon Cas, you are fun! You just gotta learn how to live a little.” Dean said.

Cas huffed. “Easy for you to say. You don’t know how I was raised.” Cas said, in a dreary and depressed tone.

Dean, worrying that Cas was on the edge of another shutdown, changed the subject. “Well how about we stop for the night?”

Cas looked at Dean curiously. “Stop? Where?”

“Wherever the train ends up at 5 pm tonight. Let’s get off, spend the night in whatever city it is. Get a hotel room, then get back on the train in the morning.” Dean suggested, making up his plan as he went along.

“Why would we want to do that?” Cas asked.

Dean shrugged. “For fun. We’re seventeen. We should be allowed to have a little bit of fun. Plus you’ve been on this train for four days and if I don’t get you on solid ground soon then I think that you’ll forget how to interact with humanity.”

“I don’t have enough money to do that.” Cas said.

“Then I’ll spot you.” Dean said. “Please, Cas. We’ll have so much fun!”

Cas rolled his eyes in a playful manner. “Alright, I guess that’ll be fun.” Cas said, as he couldn’t resist Dean when he sounded excited. 

“Yes!” Dean said, a huge smile plastered on his face. “It’s 10 am, in seven hours we’ll get off this train and explore a brand new city!”

Cas was excited too, essentially just excited to be able to get away with Dean, for just a little bit longer.


	9. The Mountain View

As Cas and Dean waited for 5 pm to roll around, they rode the train through the Rocky Mountains.

Dean, being from Kansas, and Cas, being from Illinois, had barely any experience with mountains. And for their first mountain experience, it was incredible.

Cas glanced out his window and looked straight up, and he could barely see the top of the mountain towering over him. The highway followed the curve of the river, so at any point either of the boys could look out and see people rafting down the river, on little yellow rafts that bounced along to the curve of the rapid. 

There was snow everywhere, especially layers upon layers of snow up at the top of the peaks. Cas, was lucky in this sense to have the window seat. All he had to do was lean a little bit to see up as far as possible, whereas Dean was stuck leaning over Cas’s seat to see the top, and even then he couldn’t see as much. 

“Jesus Christ I can’t see anything!” Dean exclaimed, being frustrated at his unlucky sitting position.

Cas was too wrapped up in the beautiful scenes of the mountain to notice Dean’s frustration. Dean took Cas’s awestruck wonder for ignorance.

“C’mon Cas you could at least care a little.” Dean said. 

“I do care.” Cas said, breaking his focus. “You can get as close to see as you want.”   
  
“Fine.” Dean grumbled. “Well scoot over then.”

“What? Why?” Cas said.

“Because I’m gonna sit in the seat with you.” Dean said. “Now move over.”

“Dean, we both can’t fit in the seat.” Cas said.

“Well then I’ll be on your lap because I’m coming over there whether you want me to or not.” Dean said, starting to get up out of his seat.

Cas nervously shifted over in his seat, so that he was closer to the window. Dean clambered into the seat, filling the spot Cas moved away from.  Surprisingly, Dean and Cas both fit in one seat. Of course it was a tight squeeze, but they still fit nonetheless. They were pressed together, and the whole time Cas could feel his heart beating in his throat.

_ “Come on Castiel you can control this just don’t think. Dean is your friend. He doesn’t like you, not like that. Who could ever like you like that, Castiel? You shouldn’t even like him. This is not an okay thing. Don’t think. Stop thinking about him. Stop looking at his eyes. Stop thinking about him.” _ Cas thought.

But Cas couldn’t stop thinking about him. The way his eyes reflected many different colors depending on the light. The way his voice sounded made Cas melt every time Dean said his name. Everything about Dean made Cas attracted to him, but it was the only reason Cas couldn’t get close to him.

“C’mon Cas, loosen up. We’re just sharing a seat.” Dean said, noticing Cas’s tenseness. 

“Yeah, sorry.” Cas said.

_ “Look at the clouds. Look at the river. Look at the mountain. Come ON Castiel! There’s so much to look at! You’re in the damn Rocky Mountains. You can look at anything, ANYTHING you want. There’s so much than just the one person sitting next to you. Think about anything. Think about the birds and the fish and whatever other animals are up here. Think about anything. Anything. ANYTHING BUT HIM.” _ Cas thought.

Cas tried to avoid the gaze of Dean as they both looked up at the mountains they had never seen before. Dean was happy to have this new seat where he could actually see what was happening, and Cas was nervous, sitting this close to Dean.

“It’s really beautiful, isn’t it?” Dean said. 

“Yeah, it really is.” Cas replied, heart pounding in his chest.

The train continued and Cas’s nerves eventually calmed. Both of their arms were going numb from their awkward position, so Cas eventually put his left arm over Dean’s shoulders and Dean laid his right hand on Cas’s legs. It was awkward at first, especially for Cas, but it eventually became normal.

About two hours into this new seating arrangement, Cas noticed that Dean wasn’t moving. Cas looked down to see Dean, who fell asleep on Cas’s shoulder. Cas smiled, feeling a rush of affection for this kid who he’d come to know. Cas reached his free hand over, hovering it over Dean’s cheek. His fingers inched closer and closer to his cheek, but Cas pulled away at the last second. 

“ _ Come on, Castiel, don’t be like this. Don’t be weird.” _ Cas thought. But in the end, he couldn’t help himself. He just wanted to be closer to Dean. Cas put his head on top of Dean’s and felt the rush of sleep overcome his body for a warm, afternoon nap.


	10. Sam's Call

Dean woke up an hour or two later. His eyes opened slowly, as sleep threatened to hold them shut. Dean eventually forced his eyes to focus, and the first thing he noticed was warmth. The warmth was from Cas, the kid he’d only known for a day but had grown infinitely close to. Cas was asleep, his trenchcoat (which was still the weirdest fashion choice Dean had ever seen) had fallen over Dean’s legs and was keeping both of them warm. 

Dean slowly slid away from Cas, who slumped in his seat and continued to sleep. Dean moved back to his original seat and checked his backpack for all his possessions. Change of clothes was still there, hundreds of dollars was still there, his phone was still there. Everything was still there. Dean checked his phone to see if there were any calls or texts from Sam, and expected to see nothing.

But what he did see was one missed call from Sam.

“Crap!” Dean said. “Crap this is not good!”

Dean opened his phone quickly and listened to the voicemail Sam had left.

“ _ Uh, hey Dean. You told me to only use this number for emergencies but I don’t know if this qualifies or not. Still, um, I knew you ran away but Dad didn’t. He just thought you wanted to blow off steam or something. But you’ve been gone for like a day now, so he figured it out. He called people all over the country and let me just say, he’s going to find you. He’s determined to. Okay, his car just pulled into the driveway. Gotta go.” _

Dean listened to the message three times before he understood what was happening. He didn’t expect that his dad would be this determined to get him back. All those times his dad drunkenly yelled about how he wished that Dean would just leave already… The times when his dad just seemed so disappointed in Dean being alive… Dean would not have expected his dad would ever want him to step back into the house.

But Dean realized this bubble he built for himself was going to burst. When his dad wanted something, he got it. No matter what. There was going to be no more running away, no more freedom, no more Cas.

Cas! Dean totally forgot about Cas! Just by hanging around him Cas was in danger of being sent home. And based on what Dean could infer about Cas, his home was not a good place.

Dean had no idea what to do.


	11. Into Town

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm rereading this for the first time in years as I'm posting it, and oh boy, this is when it gets good.

Cas woke up around 4 pm to see Dean sitting back in his individual seat, looking very worried. Dean heard Cas shift around in his seat, so Dean wiped the distressed expression off his face and turned to Cas.

“Hey, buddy, how’d you sleep?” Dean asked.

“Uh, pretty good actually.” Cas replied. “I noticed that you were looking very worried over there. What’s happening?”

“Uh… nothing.” Dean said, rubbing his hands together. “I’m not worried.”

“Yes you are, Dean.” Cas said. God, Dean loves the way Cas says his name. “What’s wrong?”

Dean sighed. “Fine, fine. Something happened with my brother. I’ll talk to you about it in the hotel tonight.”

“Hotel?” Cas said to himself.  _ “What hotel?” _

Dean must have sensed Cas’s confusion. “You know, since we’re stopping at a town tonight at five for the night.”

_ Oh right! That hotel! _ “Yeah, of course! We can talk at the hotel.” Cas said, feeling stupid that he had forgotten all about the night he had been thinking about all day. “So where do you think we’ll get off?”

“Looks like there’s going to be a stop at a small town in Colorado in about 30 minutes.” Dean said, looking at the train’s schedule. “Sound good?”

“Sounds great!” Cas says, and Dean smiles back at him.

Thirty minutes later, Cas and Dean gather up their possessions and head off the train. The station is smaller than the one that was in Lawrence. But then again it is a small town, Dean supposed.

Cas had a surprisingly large amount of items, so Dean made it his mission to find them a hotel room. 

“So here’s what we’re looking for.” Dean said, showing Cas the tourist guide of the town he grabbed from the station. “Somewhere that’s kind of in the center of everything, because we don’t want to have to walk too far for anything. Something low budget, since our lack of funds, but also something semi decent because nasty hotel rooms are… well… nasty. It would be nice if it was a hotel with less services though, because then less people are likely to stay there and we’re more likely to get a room without a reservation. Got it?”

“I got enough of that.” Cas said. “How do you know so much about hotels?”

“I’ve stayed in a ton of them, but I don’t think now’s the time to bring out all that. Look for hotels.”

Dean and Cas’s eyes scanned the document over and over again. They were hunters, searching for a specific place in the midst of a sea full of flashy advertising.

“Got something!” Cas said, his finger flying to a name on the paper. “The Motel 55. It’s on Main street, and since it says Main then it’s likely the center of everything. It got 3.4 stars, which isn’t great but it isn’t too bad either. There’s no breakfast or room service, and no pool or laundry room or any of that.”

Dean’s eyes searched over the information for just a moment longer. “Cas!” Dean said excitedly, clamping his hand on Cas’s shoulder. “You found the night’s hotel.”

“Cool.” Cas said, trying not to get too flustered over Dean’s warm hand on his shoulder.

“Let’s get to walking, then.” Dean said, removing his hand and getting up. Cas got up and they began walking towards Main street.


	12. An Evening Out

Dean and Cas checked into the hotel and easily found a room with two beds that they could stay in overnight. They dropped their belongings there and after asking several locals, they found a restaurant that wasn’t too far from where they were.

Cas was walking down the street and admiring the town that they were in. It was right on the edge of the Rocky Mountains, so looking east would grant him with a beautiful view of the mountains.

“You know, Dean,” Cas said, “If I wasn’t so bent on getting to getting to the west coast, I think I would want to live here.”

“Really?” Dean said, turning his head sideways to look at his friend. “Why is that?”

Cas paused for a moment. “The mountains,” he said, “There’s no mountains in the midwest. But here…” 

Cas and Dean both stopped moving for a moment in order to look at the mountains. They were so huge, but yet looked so tiny. 

“Yeah, I know what you’re saying.” Dean said. He glanced over at Cas, who was still looking at the mountains. There was so much wonder in his eyes.

Cas broke his gaze from the mountain and looked back at Dean, who had to pretend that he wasn’t just staring a moment before.

“Come on, let’s go to the restaurant.” Cas said, starting to move back down the road.

Even aside from the mountains, both boys found the town they were in rather quaint. It was small. The street they were on was considered the main street of the town, and there wasn’t much on it. Just a few hotels, several restaurants, and a couple locally owned shops. In the entire city there didn’t seem to be a building that stood above 70 feet. It was dusk, and all of a sudden a bunch of string lights turned on. They were strung around the trees, on the lampposts, criss-crossing the street, going from building top to building top. There had to be thousands of them.

“Wow…” Cas said, but so quietly that he barely registered that he spoke at all. 

“Now you really want to live here.” Dean said, more of a joke than anything.

“Shut up.” Cas said, smacking Dean on the arm. “You’re right, but still.” Cas continued to walk under the lights. He was walking at a brisker pace than Dean, his head turned upwards. Cas stopped walking a couple feet in front of Dean and turned around to face him. 

“This is so beautiful.” Cas said, standing under the lights. The wonder in his eyes hasn’t left. Instead, the wonder spread to his entire face. His smile was that of a child who’s just seen the stars for the first time. His eyes were sparkling from the lights. Cas looked so, so happy.

Dean smiled back at him, feeling his heart ache. Dean didn’t really know why, but when he heard Cas’s childish laugh the feeling multiplied.

Dean walked up to join Cas, clamping a hand on his shoulder. “Come on, buddy, let’s go get dinner.”

***

Cas and Dean found the restaurant, which was only a few more blocks down the street. It was a pizza place that was nearly full, except for a few tables in the back. They split a pizza that had pepperoni on one half and sausage and mushroom on the other half. It was the best pizza that Dean said he’d ever have, but Cas insisted that Chicago deep crust pizza was still superior.

***

The lights had been on for a while after Dean and Cas got out from the restaurant, so the street was illuminated as they walked back down to the hotel.

“This has been fun, Dean.” Cas said. “I’m glad you convinced me to do this.”

“Me too.” Dean said. He glanced at a locally owned jewelry store that was across the street. “We should go in there.”

Cas looked over at it. “Why?” 

“Because fun and I don’t want this night to be over quite yet.” Dean said, grabbing Cas’s wrist and dragging him across the street. 

The store was about the size of a convenience store and was packed wall to wall with handmade jewelry. Necklaces and rings, bracelets and earrings. There was a middle aged woman sitting behind the cash register, reading a magazine. The store was completely empty, so Cas and Dean walked around it freely.

“Ooh, Dean, come look at this!” Cas said, pointing out a necklace. Dean walked over to admire it. It was string necklace with a marble tied onto it. The marble was green, almost like the hue of a candy apple.

“Wow, that’s really pretty.” Dean said.

Cas picked it up and held it. “It’s like the color of your eyes.” 

Dean’s heart stopped. He immediately felt the strongest butterflies in his stomach, but he knew he had to play it cool. Don’t let Cas read into it.“You’ve looked into my eyes before?” Dean said, a smile creeping onto his lips.

Cas immediately regretted what he had just said. “Oh no- I mean, of course not… I’ve never- well, your eyes are… um…” Cas said, his face feeling hot. “Your eyes are just like… so green that it’s hard- it’s hard not to notice them.”

Dean smiled. “It’s okay, buddy.” He glanced over the assortment of necklaces similar to the one Cas was holding. He picked up one with a sky blue marble. “Here, this one looks like your eyes.” 

Cas’s stomach jumped, but he played it off. “I wonder how much they are.” Cas said.   


“Hey- ma’am!” Dean called to the woman behind the register. She looked up from her magazine. “How much are these necklaces?”

“Eight bucks for one.” She said. 

“Cas, we should totally get these!” Dean said. “They’re cheap and they can be like friendship necklaces or whatever!”

“Really?” Cas asked. “We’re going to be that cheesy?”

“Yes! Absolutely! I’ll get the one that looks like your eyes and you’ll get the one that looks like my eyes.” Dean said.

“It’s just so stereotypical…” Cas said, even though he was secretly hoping that he would end up getting it.

“Come on, it’ll be fun because it is cheesy! I’ll pay for them.” Dean said. “Cas, please.”

“Sure, fine, whatever.” Cas said. 

“Yes!” Dean said, taking the necklace from Cas’s hand. He brought them up to the counter where he paid for them using cash. Once purchased he handed the green one back to Cas while putting the blue one around his neck. “This is awesome, dude!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool.” Cas said, trying to ignore the feeling in his stomach and his heart.

“Let’s go back to the hotel and call it a night.” Dean said, adjusting the necklace.

“Alright, I’m coming.” Cas replied.


	13. Second Night

Cas and Dean, after struggling with who gets to control the hotel room’s one TV, decided on watching Batman. Not good Batman, but 60s Batman. Underwear outside of the pants Batman.

It was getting late, so both boys went from sitting on the edge of their separate beds to retiring under the covers. The time was about 10:30 and Cas was getting sleepy, but he stayed awake in order to talk to Dean.

“Are you kidding me right now?!” Dean said. “This is about the cheesiest TV show ever!”

“It was pretty advanced for it’s time though,” Cas said.

“They literally have cardboard cutouts that say WHAM!, so I don’t really think it’s advanced.” 

“It was the 60s, Dean.” 

“Whatever, let’s just go to bed. I’m getting tired and we have a train to catch tomorrow morning.” Dean said, clicking the POWER OFF button on the remote. Dean moved his hand up to click off the hotel light, but Cas interrupted him.

“Wait,” Cas said, “Can we talk a little bit?”

“Um, okay sure.” Dean said, keeping the light on. He was laying on his back, staring up into the ceiling and he suspected that Cas was doing the same thing.

“What was so troubling on the phone earlier today?” Cas asked, a horde of butterflies in his stomach.

Dean sighed. He couldn’t avoid it forever. If he likes Cas as much as he thinks he does, he has to let him into the bubble sooner or later. “It’s my brother. He called.” 

“Sam, right?” Cas asked.

“Yeah. Anyways, apparently my dad is pissed. Sam said that my dad is going to do anything to try and find me.” Dean said.

“Is that a huge concern?” Cas asked.

“Oh hell yes. When my dad wants something, he will do anything to get it. He’s absolutely brutal. I’m hoping that the day or so I got ahead of him is going to help. I don’t want to be found, Cas.” Dean said, his voice cracking. “I’ve been using only cash so we should still have that advantage on him, but still.”

“It’s okay, Dean.” Cas said. “I’ll help you and be with you in this until it’s all over.”

“Thanks, Cas. I really appreciate that I at least have someone with me.” Dean said. “It’s just a bonus that it’s someone as wonderful as yourself.”

Cas immediately felt his face heat up like a road on a hot summer’s day. There was no stopping the blushing, so Cas could just hope that Dean wouldn’t notice. And since they were sleeping on different beds, Dean never did.

“What about you, Cas?” Dean asked. “Do you think your family will try to find you?”

“I don’t think so.” Cas replied. “I have a ton of brothers and sisters so they’re always in and out of the house. I doubt anyone has even noticed I was gone.”

“Come on, don’t say that! There’s gotta be at least one of your siblings who noticed you were gone by now.” Dean said.

“I mean, I share a room with Gabriel so I think he’d have noticed I was gone by now.”

“Gabriel’s the prankster one right?”

“He technically prefers ‘trickster’ but yeah, same guy. I don’t think he’ll come looking for me though, he always heard me talking about how much I wanted to leave home.” Cas said. “I’m sure Hannah will have noticed too. She’s a few years younger than me, and she always idolized me. I don’t think she will now though.”

“Do you think she’ll rat on you to your parents?”

“Probably. But it’s not like they’ll care.”

“Deadbeat?” Dean asked.

“Definitely. My dad leaves for weeks or months at a time and no one knows where he is or when he’ll return. He always says business trips but I call bullcrap on that one. One time he was gone for a year and a half without a single trace.” Cas said, letting go of all the thoughts hurting his mind since he got on the train in the first place. “My mom has so many kids that she’s basically completely frazzled out. My dad’s absences have been getting longer, and so she’s been getting more and more frazzled. She stopped being a parent almost 8 years ago.”

“Wow, that’s bad.” Dean replied. “Who stepped in as parent then?”

“My brother Raphael. He’s the second oldest.” Cas said.

“Was he good at parenting?” Dean asked.

“I guess the answer would be yes. He fed us healthy food, made sure that we all did well in our classes, was a good caretaker overall. But he was a little over-religious. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in there being a God or angels or something out there, but I think some of the rules in the Bible are a little extreme. Raphael didn’t think so. He would force us to eat our healthy food and tell us that junk food is what the devil made to fatten us all up for eating.”

“Oh god, that’s a horrible thing to say!”

“You have no idea. Raphael told us that everything was a sin. He wanted to build a house where we lived and breathed the Bible.” Cas said. “I was old enough when he started preaching this stuff to understand that it’s not true, but some of my younger siblings are almost completely brainwashed.”

“Isn’t there a sibling older than him who could intervene?”

“Oh, Michael?” Cas said. “He’s such a narcissistic, pretentious ass of a person that he only worried about his studies. Raphael, in the most recent years, started really targeting me. So I would go to Michael and beg him to tell Raphael to stop but all Michael would say is ‘stop tattling’.”

“No wonder you wanted to leave home. I’m so sorry Cas.” Dean said.

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” Cas replied. “Enough about me. What about you Dean? I know your dad’s a dick so what about your mom?”

“Dead.” Dean replied quickly and nonchalantly.

Cas immediately regretted everything he’d ever said to lead up to this moment. “Oh, god- I mean… sorry for your loss. And sorry for being so insensitive about it.”

“No worries. She died when I was only 4 so I don’t really have any memories of her. Sam was only 6 months old. House fire. Ever since then, my dad’s been hopping us around. He can’t build a home because he’s afraid it’s gonna fall apart, or some crap like that.” Dean said. “That’s how I know so much about hotels. I lived in them throughout my childhood.”

“But when we met, you said you lived in Lawrence.”

“And I did, kind of. When I started high school my dad figured I would need a steady household, so he rented an apartment somewhere in Kansas. After bouncing around for a while, yet again, we ended up in Lawrence.”

“Wow, we live very different lives.” Cas said.

“But yet they both lead us to the same train.” Dean said. “That’s fate or something like that.”

“Yeah.” Cas said.

Dean reached up and turned the lights off.

“Thanks for the talk. Goodnight buddy.” Dean said.

“Night, Dean.” Cas said, his drowsiness pulling his eyelids to a close.


	14. Leaving Town

Dean set an alarm to wake them both up at 6 am, so they could get breakfast and catch the train with no worries about time. When the alarm pulled him awake, Cas was already awake.

Cas was sitting on the edge of his bed, muttering to himself.

“You’re so close, Castiel. There’s no reason for you to give in to who you are any time soon. You can fight against this,” Cas was mumbling. It was just quiet enough that Dean couldn’t hear.

Dean rubbed his eyes and stretched his shoulders. “Cas, what are you doing?”

“Oh, just praying for safe passage.” Cas responded. Growing up in a religious house taught Cas that if you say you’re praying, no one will question what you’re doing.

“Hm, okay. You ready to get back on the train?” Dean asked.

“Almost.” Cas said. “I’m not particularly dressed yet.”

Dean was still so groggy from sleep that he barely noticed that Cas wasn’t in his typical trench coat (which is still the strangest fashion choice in Dean’s opinion). Cas was wearing only a gray t-shirt and his boxers.

Dean had never seen Cas wearing anything less than a thick trench coat, so Dean spent a couple seconds studying his back. The way his shirt hung off his skin, the arch of the shirt mimicking the arch of of spine, the way his shoulder blades curved. Cas was slightly bent over so the shirt rode up a little bit, revealing a small area of his lower back.

Dean didn’t realize he was staring until Cas starting talking.

“Sorry for my indecency.” Cas said. “I just can’t stand sleeping in layers. Unlike you, who slept in jeans.”

“Hey,” Dean said, “Don’t bash my way of sleeping. I’ve spent many nights in jeans, and I’ve learned to enjoy it.”

“Still weird.”

“You’re the one who wears a trench coat.” Dean replied.

“Woah, Dean, that was way out of pocket!” Cas said, pretending to be offended. “I thought we were friends!”

Dean laughed. “Whatever, man. Let’s go get breakfast.”

***

Cas got dressed in his typical clothing (including the green necklace) and Dean found a small diner right across the street from the hotel. They crossed over and ate a simple breakfast. They both agreed that it wasn’t the best place they’d ever eaten at, but it had damn good coffee.

***

They left the hotel and began their journey back to the train station. They got to the train station with about fifteen minutes before the train came.

“So, after spending a night here, do you still think you could live here?” Dean asked.

“I think so. It’s nice. It’s quiet and cute.” Cas replied.

“Well we only saw the tourist trap parts. Maybe the rest of the town is super crappy.” 

“That’s possible. But I’m going to the west coast anyways. Maybe this can just be my fallback.” Cas replied.

Dean shrugged. “Well where would you want to live in this tiny ass town?” 

Cas took a moment to think. He glanced around. “Right there.” Cas pointed to a house with a FOR SALE sign staked in the front lawn. It was a decent looking house, but it was 30 feet away from the train tracks.

“Seriously?” Dean asked. “You’d be woken up by the train literally all the time.”

“Yeah, that would kinda suck, but the train would remind me of a good thing.” Cas glanced over at Dean, flashing his sky-colored eyes. “Getting to meet you.”

Dean could feel the blush in his stomach before it actually reached his face. Cas laughed at Dean when he saw how red his face turned.

“Cas you can’t just say something like that and expect me not to blush!” Dean defended.

“I just can’t believe I made you blush!”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever you did. But I’m sure I made you blush at some point too.”

“No way.” Cas said, blatantly denying the time Dean made him blush so hard he thought his was going to explode. And that was only last night.

“Whatever.” Dean said, just as he heard the familiar rumble of an approaching train.

Cas and Dean boarded the train with no issues, but they were no longer in the caboose, sadly.

“I call window seat!” Dean said, stealing the seat before Cas could object.

Cas just shrugged and slid into the aisle seat as the train lurched forward and their journey to the west coast continued.


	15. The Problem

_ Two days later _

Nothing much had happened to the two boys over the next few days. They traveled through Utah, and most of Nevada. They were nearing the western border of Nevada, getting close to California, when disaster caught up to the two boys.

“That’s why I’m pissed. Immediately when I got the window seat the scenic views ended.” Dean said.

“That was just an unfortunate coincidence.” Cas replied.

“Says you, mister ‘I got a great view of the mountains’.”

“Remember you crawled into my seat to be able to see.”

“Whatever.” Dean said.

A middle aged woman with brown, but graying, hair approached Dean and tapped his shoulder.

Dean glanced at Cas, who shrugged, and then looked up at her. “Can I help you, ma’am?”

“Are you the boy from the news?” she asked.

“What the hell?” Dean muttered. Dean looked back at Cas, who was just as confused as he was. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

“The boy who went missing from Kansas? Dave Winchester?”

Every gear in Dean’s mind immediately clicked. His mind was stuck in an endless loop of  _ “This is bad, this is so freaking bad, this is bad, this is so freaking bad” _ but his mouth managed to muster the words, “I’m sorry, but you must be mistaken.”

The woman turned and walked away, and Cas put his hand on Dean’s shoulder.

“Dean, what’s going on?” Cas asked.

“It’s nothing.” Dean said. He was trying to maintain calm but he felt like his whole head was spinning.

“No it’s not.” Cas said, an intensity to his voice that immediately snapped Dean from his spiral. “It’s not nothing. I know it.” Cas placed his other hand on Dean’s knee.

Dean almost spasmed from the touch. He felt goosebumps going all the way from that spot to his heart. With that touch, he knew he had to tell Cas what was going on. Cas was too much a part of his life at this point to lie to him.

“I’ve told you this, but my dad is nuts. I think that he’s so pissed off at me for running off that he’s launched a nationwide hunt for me.”

Cas leaned forward, almost as if he didn’t hear what Dean said. “Are you serious?”

Dean nodded. “I’m not sure about this, but I think that he might have used footage from that hotel we stayed at the other night in order to track me.”

“This is ridiculous.” Cas said, his eyes wide. “Do you know what you’re going to do?”

Dean’s mind opened a plan that he had tucked away in his brain the second he boarded the train. The one he thought of just in case. The one that he had continuing to build in his mind when Sam called him. The one he was terrified to drag Cas into. “I think so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My little writer brain is doing an evil laugh right about now.


	16. The Plan

“I think what I’m gonna do first, is get the hell off this train. Trains take the same route from point A to B every time. If someone recognizes me, they could catch this train in a couple of hours.” Dean said. “I think the next thing to do is steal a car.”

“Steal a car?!” Cas said. “That’s illegal!”

“How the hell else am I going to get anywhere?” Dean replied. “It’s the only option. Then I guess I’ll go somewhere far away. I think in Washington there’s gotta be a couple towns that are super secluded. If I can get one of them to take me in-”

“You’re seriously going to give up everything just to avoid your father?” Cas interjected.

“Yes.” Dean replied, no hesitation in his voice. “He’s a terrible person, Cas. You have  _ no  _ idea of the crap that he’s done to me in my life. I won’t go back there for anything.”

“I don’t think this is a good decision.” Cas said.

“It’s my decision to make.” Dean said, colder than he normally would to Cas. But this isn’t a rebellious vacation anymore, it’s Dean’s very survival. He glanced at the train stop list. “It looks like the next stop will be in very eastern California. In about 20 minutes.” Dean turned to Cas. “I guess this is goodbye.”

“What?! No.” Cas said.

“No?” Dean questioned.

“I’m not going to say goodbye to you.” 

“Why not? I’m getting off the train in 20 minutes!”

“I’ll go with you.”

Dean’s eyebrows shot up. “Hell no. Sorry, Cas, but I’m not letting you come with me.”

“Why not?”

“Because you still have a shot at getting a normal life! You’re not wanted by everyone in America!” Dean said, getting riled up.

“I’m still going with you.” Cas insisted.

“Every time you’re with me it puts a target on your back.”

“So?” Cas replied. “Dean, I want to help you. I’ve gone this far with you already. I’m not going to let you go now.”

Dean realized that Cas really meant this. He wasn’t just doing this to be nice, Cas really wants to be with Dean, through everything. Dean’s stomach dropped knowing he can’t do this to Cas, but also knowing that Cas won’t Dean go alone.

Dean leaned in. “Cas,” Dean said, his voice soft, “This is going to get dangerous.”

“That means you’ll need me the most now.” Cas said. “I want to help you. I’ll get you out of this mess.”

Dean sighed, surrendering. “Okay. But it’s going to get more difficult and dangerous. Are you ready for that?”

“As long as I’m going through it with you, I’m ready for anything.” Cas said.

Dean sighed again, this time in exasperation. He really cares for this kid. A lot more than he probably should. Dean knows that there are so many feelings he is developing for this boy, several of them going beyond friendship, and secretly Dean didn’t want to have to say goodbye to Cas either. But now he’s leading Cas into his screwed up world that he was trying so hard to escape. 

What’s the best that could come out of this situation?

But more importantly,

What’s the worst that could happen?


	17. The Car

The train began to slow down. They had just passed into California. 

“Your last chance is here. Are you sure you want to do this?” Dean asked.

“Yes. One hundred percent.” Cas replied. He had never felt more sure about any other decision in his life. Even choosing to run away was harder than this. He somehow knew, deep in his heart, that he was meant to stay with Dean. Through anything and everything. He had to be with Dean.

Dean sighed. He didn’t want to lead Cas down this road, but there was no arguing with Cas. Secretly, Dean was excited to be able to spend more time with Cas but he was still very scared that something bad was going to catch up to Dean and that Cas would get caught in the crossfire.

When the train stopped moving, both boys stood up and grabbed their possessions. They walked off the train, without knowing what they were getting into.

The train station was basically empty. They were in a small town on the very eastern border of California. They didn’t expect to end up anywhere huge, but this town was painfully tiny.

“I think this is the town.” Dean said. All he could see is the train station, a convenience store, and two houses. 

“Wow. And I thought that other town we stayed at was small.” Cas replied. “There’s going to be no buses or anything leaving from this town, so how do we get to anywhere?”

“Illegally.” Dean said. “We’re going to steal that car.” Dean gestured to a black 1967 Chevy Impala in the parking lot of the train station.

“Dean, we can’t do that. That’s someone’s car!” Cas said.

“But look!” Dean walked over to the car. “Everything here is wet, so it have to have rained. Since we didn’t see any rain today, then it must have rained last night. But there is a dry spot under this car, so that means it hasn’t moved since it rained last night. That means that there’s probably no one using it.” Dean put his hand on the hood. “Plus it’s one hell of a car and it’s a shame that no one is driving it.”

“Still, it’s morally wrong.” Cas said.

“Okay but Cas, buddy,” Dean said, grabbing both of Cas’s shoulders and looking him straight in the eye. “We’re in this situation called an emergency, and we need to maybe do things that you’ll not like. But they’re all for the greater good. Okay?”

Cas nodded. He may not like Dean’s actions right now, but damn did he like being able to look straight into Dean’s eyes.

Dean pulled away and grabbed something from his backpack. “I shouldn’t really carry this with me everywhere I go, but you never know when you’ll need to steal a car.” Dean showed Cas a long, flat, piece of metal that he’s seen in movies and television shows. 

“I’ve seen those, you can unlock a car door with that right?” Cas asked.

“Yep, called a Slim Jim.” Dean said, already sliding the tool into the space between the window and the door on the driver's seat. “Ridiculous name, but it’s a pretty good tool.”

Dean fiddled with the car door until there was an audible click. Dean slid the Slim Jim out and was able to open the car door. 

“Hey, could you grab my bag and throw it in the back seat?” Dean asked while sitting in the driver's seat. Cas picked up the backpack from the ground and opened the car door, which Dean had unlocked. He threw the bag onto the back seat and walked around the car to sit in the passenger seat.

Dean had somehow already managed to hotwire the car. The engine was purring and Dean really seemed to be enjoying himself.

“I love this car so much.” Dean said, rubbing his hand on the dashboard. His eyes were wide, taking in the curves of the leather and the way the steering wheel felt in his hands. He noticed Cas staring at him from the passenger seat and quickly changed his expression of wonder to the most serious one he could muster.

Dean put his seatbelt on and put the car in reverse. Cas tried not to show it, but damn was he falling hard for this boy. The way his eyes lit up when the car started was the same way Cas looked at the fairy lights a few nights ago. And the way Cas is looking at Dean now is the way Dean was staring at Cas. It was the feeling of complete love.

***

Dean drove north for the rest of the day. He flew up the interstate, loving the freedom of being in a car. The train could only go so fast, but the car could move at 70 miles an hour if Dean wanted. And Dean really wanted.

Cas, on the other hand, was fearing for his life as Dean tore up the road at speeds Cas had never felt before. Cas kept telling Dean to slow down, but he could never keep a speed lower than 80 mph for more than a minute or two.

Dean flew down the road until it started to get dark out. They spent the whole day listening to music, as the previous owner of the car shoved the glove compartment full of classic rock CDs. The day turned to evening and Dean decided to call it a night. The car, which he already started calling baby, was in desperate need of gas. Dean pulled into a gas station that was right next to a hotel, just in case he couldn’t get the car started again.

While the car was fueling up, Dean opened up the trunk to see if there was anything that the previous owner might have left. 

“Cas, there’s a key back here!” Dean said. 

“What?”

“A key! Like a key to this car is back here!” 

“Wait, seriously!”

Dean walked up to Cas’s window and showed him the key. “There was this note attached to it too.  _ ‘I’m starting my new life. You’d better treat her well _ .” 

“This is almost unbelievably lucky, Dean. Are you sure there’s not something wrong with the car?” Cas asked.

“Everything seems to be working just fine. My uncle Bobby is a mechanic, so I’ve spent a lot of time with him and cars. Trust me, I would know if something was wrong.” Dean replied. “The previous owner just didn’t need it anymore.”

“Well that would explain why it was at a train station.” Cas said. “They must have been going somewhere new, just like we were.”

“But why would they leave such a nice car?” Dean said. “If I was going anywhere, this car could be going with me.”

“You don’t know their story, Dean.” 

“Yeah, yeah. But hey, now we have a car to call ours!” Dean said. “Do you just want to stay at that hotel for the night? I know it’s not the best but it’s close and I think we should give the car a little bit of a rest.”

“Sure.” Cas said. “Can I go check us in while you finish up here?”

“Alright.” Dean said, giving Cas a wad of his cash. “Use this to pay. And give a false name. Please.”

“I’ll do that.” Cas said, getting out of the seat and walking towards the hotel.


	18. Hotel California

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter has nothing to do with that song, I promise. It's just a hotel? In California? It was too perfect to pass up. Sorry, I'll shut up and let you read now.

“So, bad news.” Cas said, walking back up to Dean who was leaning on the car.

“What is it? Are there no more rooms available?” Dean asked.

“There is, but they only have one tiny room with one twin sized bed.”

“One twin size?! That’s ridiculously small.”

“Exactly. So what are we going to do? We can ask if there’s a hotel nearby.” Cas offered.

Dean sighed. “No, Baby needs a break. We’re too far away from anything. We’ll just have to stay in that room. If there’s a floor, it will be fine for me. I’ve slept on the floor many times.”

Cas shrugged. “I’ll go in and get the key.”

Right when Cas disappeared into the hotel Dean put his face into his hands. “Why couldn’t you just say ‘lets share the bed Cas because I think I’m falling in love with you’?” He whispered to himself. 

“You coming, Dean?” Cas said, peeking his head back out the entrance of the hotel.

“Yeah, I’m coming!” Dean said, grabbing his one bag of belongings and walking into the hotel.

Cas grabbed the key from the man sitting behind the desk and found the room. Right when Dean and Cas walked in, they realized that the room was smaller than either of them could have anticipated. In total, the room was probably about the size of the average bedroom. It had one twin size bed pushed into the very corner of the room, and a very small bathroom that was basically the size of a closet, but with a sink, shower, and toilet in it.

“Wow, when he said it was small, he wasn’t kidding.” Cas said.

“Seriously.” Dean said. “So I guess this means I’ll take the floor.”

When Dean looked down at the floor he noticed a variety of stains splattering it. He’s never seen the color of some of the stains before.

“Dean, you really shouldn’t sleep on the floor,” Cas said, “It will probably give you an STD. Just share the bed with me.”

“Well I don’t want to get all in your business when you’re trying to sleep.” Dean said.

“You won’t.” Cas said, taking off his trenchcoat and throwing it against a wall.

“Are you sure you’re comfortable with that though?”

“I guess if you really want me to I can sleep on the floor-”

“No!” Dean interjected. “We can share the bed. It will be fine.”

“If we’re going to sleep tonight we should probably start now, since it’s already eleven.” Cas said, glancing at the small alarm clock in the room. Cas already sat down on the bed and was untying his shoes.

“Alright, let me just put my bag down somewhere and I guess… get into bed with you.” Dean said, choking on the last few words.

“Are you going to make it this awkward the whole time?” 

Dean put his bag against one of the walls and turned back around to Cas. “Probably.”

“Well you’d better come sit here so then we can fall asleep faster and it will be less awkward.”

Dean sat down next to Cas on the bed and started taking off his shoes.

“Dean this is kind of a weird question, but do you mind if I take off some of my clothes?” Cas asked.

“Um, what?” Dean replied.

Cas sighed. “I just, I can’t sleep with so many layers and I need to take off some of my clothes. I’ll leave my pants on.”

“Sure, get comfy.” Dean said.

Dean tried not to watch as Cas took off his dark blue blazer and threw it against the wall with his trench coat. He unbuttoned his white shirt to reveal only a gray shirt underneath.

“So… do you want to be next to the wall?” Cas asked, more unclothed than Dean had ever seen him before.

“No, I’ll take the other side.” Dean said. He could feel his stomach knotting into an untieable mess of nerves. 

“Okay, well don’t blame me when you fall off.” Cas said, pulling the covers out from under their legs. He scooted himself under the covers and laid down. “Wow, this pillow is really flat.”

Dean took a deep breath and laid his head down next to Cas’s. “You’re right.” Dean pulled the covers up over his chest. His legs were touching Cas’s. His head was right next to him. Dean could feel the warmth emanating from Cas and filling the space between them. How easy it would be for him to just lean over and hold Cas exactly the way he wanted to…


	19. Cas's Confession

“Dean, can I tell you something?” Cas asked apprehensively. The lights were off and both Dean and Cas were sharing the same tiny bed. Both of them were staring at the ceiling, desperately wanting the other to make some sort of move.

“Sure.” Dean replied, feeling his heart pounding in his chest.

“You have to promise me that you won’t freak out though.” Cas said.

“Unless you tell me that you secretly are a giant spider that wants to eat me, I don’t think I’ll freak out.”

“Dean, please be serious.” Cas said. Dean could feel the weight in his voice. “You have to promise me that you’ll still be my friend though after this.” Cas said, feeling the tears welling up in his eyes. He knows that he has to get this out, no matter how painful it is to admit to himself. If Dean doesn’t like it, then Cas will just leave.

“Of course, buddy.” Dean said.

“Dean…” Cas took a deep breath. “I’m gay.”

Dean felt his heart skyrocket in his chest. He wanted to shout out in joy, he wanted to kiss Cas right here right now, but all he could muster was a tiny little, “Okay.”

“And you’re fine with that?” Cas asked.

“Of course. I’m about the farthest from homophobic you can get.” Dean swallowed.  _ ‘Am I really going to do this right now? Well there’s no better time when you’re being chased by the police than in a dusty motel room sharing the same bed as the guy you’re thirsting for.’ _ Dean sighed. “Cas, I’m a little gay too.”

“A little gay?”

“Well, bi. I guess I should have said, ‘Cas, I’m bisexual’.” Dean said.

Cas’s heart lifted immediately. He had a chance with this one.

Dean kept talking. He wanted to fill the awkward silence so that he didn’t do anything stupid. “So are you out to your ultra-religious family?”

“Yes, and I wish I wasn’t. When 14, going on 15, I was getting really conflicted about it and decided to confide in Gabe, but Raphael overheard our conversation and confronted me about it. He told me that homosexuality is an abomination and I need to be shamed. He outed me to my entire family, even my little sisters. None of them talked to me for a while. Raphael then decided that being shamed by my family wasn’t enough and took me in front of our entire church to be shouted at. When I got home Raphael told me that I had a day to pack my stuff and get out. I wasn’t even fifteen yet, Dean.”

Dean could hear Cas’s voice crack as he started to cry. “I was so young, I couldn’t be out on my own so I begged and begged and begged for forgiveness. Raphael could stay as long as I went to a conversion camp. So rather than going to summer camp, I went to a conversion camp. I won’t tell you everything they did to me, but I’ll say that they broke me as a person. I went back home, a shell of who I used to be, and managed to earn forgiveness by telling people that I was over my homosexuality.”

“Oh, god, Cas.” Dean said.

“I don’t know what got me through the camp. I guess I was stronger than most. I was able to lie and tell people that I finally was straight, even when I still held a bit of my true self from getting killed. Over the next year, as I recovered from the camp, I let the little bit of myself that I still held on to grow and help me become who I really was. I still have a lot of problems, and I’m still trying to get used to the fact that I like boys, and I still feel a wrong whenever I get a crush. Saying this to you was the first time I ever said it out loud since the camp.”

“Cas, I’m so glad you could tell me.” Dean said.   


“I have always felt like I could trust you.” Cas replied. Dean couldn’t help but smile at that.

“So is that really why you ran away?” Dean asked.

“Yeah. I couldn’t risk Raphael finding out that I was… gay… again, and sending me back to a worse camp.” Cas said.

“As long as I’m with you, Cas Novak, I will make sure no one ever hurts you again.”

Cas realized, with that sentence, that he had never loved anything more than as much as he loves Dean right now.


	20. Dean's Confession

“So what about you?” Cas said. “Are you out to your family?”

Dean sighed. “Yeah, both Sam and my dad know but my dad doesn’t like it. I knew he would hate it.”

“How did he find out?”

“Well a year ago I was dating this guy and my dad said that he would be out for the weekend, so I took the guy to my house. We were making out on the couch and surprise! Guess who decides to come home early.” Dean swallowed hard, as he was starting to well up. “Needless to say he ripped my boyfriend and I apart and started beating me. Once he was done getting his anger out, he screamed at me over and over. He basically just said that he wouldn’t have a faggot in his house. He threatened to throw me out too but I told him that Sam needed me. He let me stay as long as I never dated another boy.”

“And so you stopped dating guys?” Cas asked.

“Yeah. Every time I realized that I was starting to like another guy, I repressed my feelings until they went away and I ended up liking a girl.” Dean said. “It’s not like I mind dating girls, because girls are great, but there are so many guys I think I could have had a chance with but my dad would probably kill me.”

“At least Raphael never hurt me like that.” Cas said. “We’re just both a couple of gay losers.”

“Yeah.” Dean said. “How did you know you were gay?”

Cas shrugged and Dean could feel the movement pressed up against his body. “I don’t know, I guess I just never saw the appeals of girls. Raphael always preached celibacy so I thought it was good that I didn’t like girls, because then I wouldn’t want to have sex with them. But then around middle school I think I started really realizing that I found boys very, very attractive.”

“Have you ever been with a boy?”

“Like… what do you mean? Like kissed or dated?”

“Yeah, both.”

“Well, when I was in eighth grade, before I told Gabe or anyone, I found out that this very attractive boy was gay. I told him that I was to, and we kind of started dating. It was very, very closeted. We weren’t out at school or at home so we would both tell our parents that we had some sort of club after school and we would meet up. I had my first kiss with him.”

“Awe, that’s cute!”

“Yeah, it kind of was. The good thing about it is the good memories. It was after my original internal issues with my sexuality and before the whole Raphael thing. It was just an innocent, adorable first love.” Cas said.

“What happened with that boy?”

“He moved away that summer. He gave me a goodbye kiss, and then I never saw him again.” Cas said. “So have you been with a boy?”

“Oh yeah.” Dean said, smirking to himself. “I started dating boys when I was 14. I’ve kissed many boys, as well as many girls, to be honest.

“Who’s better at kissing? Girls or boys?” Cas asked.

“Well, you see, there are many different factors to consider. Girls are so soft and gentle. They’re delicate and shy. Boys are rougher. They kiss like they really mean it. That might just be because if two boys kiss, then they deliberately meant to find each other. I love feeling another boy’s stubble against my lips.” Dean realized that he was describing what it would be like to kiss Cas. He quickly switched topics. “But with girls, it’s so amazing to feel their chapstick after you kiss them. It’s like a little part of her still holding onto you.” Dean sighed.

“Dean, your bi is showing.” Cas said.

Dean laughed. “Honestly, Cas, I’m glad I was able to tell you all that. I’ve never been able to talk about this with anyone. And it feels so nice.”

“Me too.” Cas replied. “You’re a great person to have around. I’m glad I met you.”

Dean’s heart leaped when Cas said ‘person’ and not ‘friend’. Dean’s words caught in his throat. ‘ _ Am I going to tell him, here, now? That I think I’m in love with him? No, no. Not tonight. I don’t want this to feel like a ‘last two people’ in the universe type of deal. I want this moment to be special. I’ll make it special. For him. For Cas.’ _ Dean coughed. “Sorry, got lost in thought.”

“It’s all good.” Cas replied.  _ “What were you expecting? A dramatic love confession. Castiel you know you never get this lucky. He probably just choked on saliva or something.” _

“Well, we should probably get some sleep. We may have to do some running tomorrow.” Dean said. 

“Good call. ‘Night, Dean.”

“‘Night, Cas.”


	21. Daring Escape

Dean woke up early. Cas was still sleeping peacefully next to him, so Dean carefully slid out of the bed and walked over to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth and showered, and when we walked back out he saw Cas standing up.

“‘Morning.” Dean said. Cas just grunted in reply. “What, are you not happy to see me?”

“I’m not happy to see you at 5 in the morning.” Cas said. “It’s way too early to be awake.”

“Well, if we’re going to escape from the cops, we’re going to have to have some early mornings and some late nights. You can sleep in the car though, if you’d like.” Dean said.

Cas just grunted again and trudged into the bathroom. 

In a few minutes, Cas was out, looking exactly the same but smelling nicer. “That’s the first shower I’ve taken since we stopped at that town in Colorado.”

“Where we got these?” Dean said, tugging on his blue necklace.

Cas touched his matching green necklace. He almost forgot he had it, it felt like a part of him now. “Yeah. That place.”

“C’mon, let’s go get breakfast. I saw a great place just a mile away when we were driving in.”

Cas and Dean checked out of the hotel room and got in the freshly stolen Impala. They got gas before they went to breakfast and then they stopped at a tiny diner that was almost completely empty.

Dean and Cas walked in and a little bell on the door rang. A middle aged woman with graying hair came over to them, handing them menus and sitting them down across from each other at a booth. They both flipped open the menus. 

“What do you think you’ll get, Dean?” Cas asked. 

“I don’t know, this thing called Pig in a Poke looks pretty good.” Dean said. “On the other hand, maybe not.”

“I think I’ll get pancakes. I love pancakes.” Cas said.

When the same woman came over to take their order, both Cas and Dean ordered pancakes. Cas ordered plain pancakes and Dean ordered chocolate chip pancakes, agreeing to share. Both boys spent the time waiting for their pancakes talking, not bringing up what they had discussed last night.

The pancakes arrived and Dean put half of his stack of warm, fluffy, chocolatey pancakes on Cas’s plate and Cas put half of his plain but still warm, fluffy, and delicious pancakes on Dean’s plate.

They ate in silence, as both of them were famished. Both stacks of mismatched pancakes were gone in a matter of minutes. Dean wanted to take a little bit longer before he started to drive so he suggested that Cas and him order coffee and hang out in the booth for just a couple more minutes.

Before they knew it, 30 minutes passed. They were both slumped in opposite sides of the booth, feet up next to each other. 

Dean laughed. “So you’re saying that your brother… Gab-reel-”

“Gadreel.” Cas corrected.

“Gadreel, my bad, he got expelled from middle school by letting all of the frogs out of their cages?” Dean said.

Cas smiled. “Yes, they got everywhere and he was expelled immediately.”

“How many frogs was it?” Dean asked.

“I’m not sure, but I’ve heard over 100.” Cas said.

“Wow!” Dean said. “That dude has some nerve.”

“You have no idea how much trouble he got in with Dad. My dad grounded him indefinitely.” Cas said.

Cas kept talking, but Dean’s focus was somewhere else. He was watching two women, who were sitting near the door of the diner. They were whispering hushedly. One of the women kept making glances towards the booth were Dean and Cas were sitting, and the other was on the phone. When Dean heard the wail of police sirens in the distance, he finally understood what was happening.

Cas was still talking, and Dean interrupted him. “Cas, stop talking.”

“What? Why?” Cas asked.

“I think we’ve been recognized.” Dean said.

“Wait, what?” Cas said. “Like… here? From the news?”

Dean nodded. The sirens kept getting louder. “We have to go. Now.” Dean slapped thirty dollars on the table - enough to cover breakfast and the tip - and got up out of the booth. Cas got up as well.

Dean kept glancing out the window. He had to think of something. The Impala was parked out front, but that’s likely where the cops would pull up. “Cas, do you know how to drive a car?” Dean asked.

“Yeah, but I’m no good at it and I don’t have my license.” Cas said.

“That’s enough for me.” Dean said. He grabbed the car key from his pocket and pushed it into Cas’s hand. “Go out front and start the car. Drive it around to the back, then get out but keep the car running. Sit in the passenger seat and I’ll be there in a second.”

“Dean-

“You won’t get caught. They don’t know we’re driving an Impala. Just go. Now.” Dean ordered.

Cas gave Dean an apprehensive look and then ran out the door and into the Impala. Dean looked around and found the door to the kitchen. He walked as quickly as he could to the kitchen door, right as he saw the cops pull up in front of the building. Dean opened the door to the kitchen. It was mostly empty, except for two younger chefs.

“Hey!” One of the chefs said. “You’re not supposed to be in here!”

“I’ll be gone in a second, just please tell me where your back door is.” Dean said.

“I can tell you where the front door is!” The chef replied.

“Please!” Dean yelled. He had never felt so desperate in his life.

The chef sighed and pointed to a small hallway behind the kitchen. “It’s down there. Just don’t come back.”

“Promise.” Dean said, sprinting down the hallway. He opened the door at the end of the hallway to find Cas and the Impala, doing exactly what he said. “Hallelujah.” Dean muttered to himself, sliding into the driver’s seat.

“What now?” Cas asked. 

“We make a speedy getaway.” Dean said, plunging the car into drive and speeding down the road. He was breaking the speed limit by about 30 miles an hour but he didn’t care, as a speedy getaway means speedy. He merged onto the main road and followed the road signs until he got to the major interstate and started heading north again.

Once the car was cruising safely on the highway, Cas finally spoke again. “Wow, I think I’ve been holding my breath since the diner.”

Dean laughed. “Yeah, that was scary. But I can’t promise you that won’t be the only terrifying and daring escape we’ll have to make.”

“I never expected it to be.”


	22. On the Road

“Hey, Cas, look.” Dean said, pointing to a road sign. The sign read “Welcome to Oregon”.

“Cool, now I can tell people that I’ve been to Oregon.” Cas said.

“Hey, Cas, can I ask you something?” Dean said.

“Sure.” Cas replied as nonchalantly as possible, even though his stomach was flipping like a gymnast on steroids.

“Why did you decide to get off the train with me?” Dean asked.

“Well, I felt like I had a friend in you.” Cas said. “I’ve been alone for most of my life, literally or figuratively, and for once I wasn’t. I was never able to be open and honest with anyone. My family, least of all. But with you, I was actually able to be myself. I didn’t want to be alone again.”

“Oh, so you did it out of selfish reasons?” Dean asked sarcastically.

“What! No, no way!” Cas said, clearly not taking the sarcasm. “I mean, we were friends and I didn’t want you to be alone either.”

“Buddy, I’m kidding.” Dean said. “I’m glad you came with me. I may be forcing you into a life of crime but I’m still glad you’re with me.”

“I’m glad I’m here too. It may be slightly terrifying because you drive way too fast-”

“Hey!”

“- but it’s the most fun I’ve had in years.” Cas said. 

“I can agree with that.” Dean said.

“Dean, can I ask you a question?” 

“Sure.”

“Do you think we’ll get caught?” Cas asked.

Dean paused. He took a little time to think before responding. “Maybe. I would say there’s a 50-50 chance. We’re a few steps ahead of the cops but I mean, they’re cops. My dad’s relentless enough, so they won’t stop for a while. But here’s the thing, Cas. I won’t stop running from them. I won’t stop until we lose them. And even if worst comes to worst, I won’t let them get you. It’s not you they’re after, so no matter what happens, I won’t ever let you get caught. That’s a promise.”

Cas was blushing. He couldn’t stop his feelings for Dean. It’s beyond what he had ever felt for anyone. All he could hope was that Dean felt the same. 

“Cas, what do you say we take a second off the run and go to the beach?” Dean asked.

“The beach?” 

“Yeah. It’s only about 15 miles away. I’ve never seen the beach and I would like to.” Dean said.

“Do we have the time?”

“I think so. Even if we don’t, it’s worth it. It’s the beach.”

“Then sure.” Cas said. “I would like to see the beach too.”

Dean smiled, changing lanes and taking the exit that will take them to the beach.


	23. The Beach

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, before you say it, this was inspired by Twist & Shout. A fic like that doesn't ever really leave your mind, does it? Anyways, if you haven't read Twist & Shout, please finish this fic and then read it. It's very good, and a staple of the SPN fandom at this point.

“Wow, it’s a lot colder than I imagined.” Cas said, holding his arms to him, looking out at the ocean spread in front of him.

Dean shrugged. “I guess a storm decided to roll in today.” 

They both looked up at the gray clouds gathering above them. It made everything dark and cold, but still beautiful. The ocean was more mysterious. The water looked like it was dark gray, and the sand was colder and wetter than either of them imagined. 

Dean watched as Cas sat in the sand and took off his shoes and socks. He stood back up and wiggled his toes in the sand, laughing quietly to himself. Dean felt the leap in his heart when Cas smiled. 

Cas walked down to the ocean for the cold ocean water to lap at his feet. The water went on forever. It was just like Cas imagined. But colder, it was definitely colder than Cas imagined.

“Dean!” Cas yelled. “Come on, come feel the water.”

Dean couldn’t say no to him. He took off his shoes and socks as well and ran down to feel the cold water with Cas. Dean stood next to Cas, on his right hand side. Dean put his hand on Cas’s shoulder. Cas internally shuddered under the touch.

“Are you glad you got to see the beach?” Cas asked.

“Very much so.” Dean said.

As Dean looked out into the ocean, contemplating everything in his life, one thing was for sure. He wanted to be with Cas forever. Something in his stomach made him know that he loved this boy. This boy he had known for only about two weeks. It made no sense, that Dean could love someone he barely knew. But Dean only knew what he felt. And it was love.

Dean reached up with the hand that wasn’t on Cas’s shoulder and touched the blue necklace hanging around his neck. He glanced at the similar necklace hanging around Cas’s neck. Dean could only hope and pray that Cas felt the same way.

Dean was waiting for the right moment to tell Cas. The perfect moment. Dean figured that right here, right now on this cold, wet beach, was about as perfect as it was going to get.

Dean took his hand off Cas’s shoulder and slid it down his arm. His fingers traced the edge of Cas’s trench coat all the way down to his hand, where Dean interlocked his fingers with Cas’s cold fingers.

“Dean…” Cas said, a little apprehensively. Cas turned towards Dean, who looked very, very nervous.

“Cas, I like you.” Dean said, his voice quavering. He turned to face Cas. “I like you, like a lot. I really like you in a very romantic way.” 

Cas felt his heart jump in his throat. He tightened his fingers around Dean’s. “Dean.”

“It’s okay, I know I haven’t known you very long-”

“Dean, I like you too.” Cas said, smiling.

Dean’s eyes immediately teared up. He had never felt happier. Ever. He couldn’t stop smiling.

Cas smiled back. He had never hoped to ever be this lucky. 

“Wow.” Dean said, wiping his eyes with his free hand. “I’m sorry, I just can’t deal with how happy this makes me.”

“It’s okay.” Cas said, tearing up a little bit too.

“I was so scared to tell you. But I knew I had to.” Dean said. “And I’m so, so relieved.”

Cas nodded. “I don’t think this is real. I’m never this lucky.”

“Oh, it’s not luck, baby.” Dean replied, stopping after he realized what he just said. “Do you mind if I call you baby?”

“No, no, Dean. I love it.” Cas said, the biggest smile on his face. “Are we like together now?”

“I guess, if you want to be. I’m completely down for it I just want to make sure-”

“I’m down for it.” Cas said, smiling.

Dean looked back out to the open, cold, ocean. There was only one thing left to do.

Dean took a step closer to Cas. They were standing face to face. They had never been this close while standing, and Dean noticed that Cas was just a few inches shorter than him.

Cas looked up. Dean’s face was so close. 

“Can I kiss you?” Dean asked.

“Please.” 

Dean leaned in as Cas did the same. Dean closed his eyes. Dean felt Cas’s lips against his, and everything felt perfect. There was electricity that shot all the way from his lips to his toes and settle as a frothy mess in his stomach. He had kissed girls and boys alike but none of it ever felt this electrifying as it did with Cas. With Cas, it was right. It was always where he was meant to be.

And Cas, once he felt Dean’s soft lips against his, felt like he was whole again. All the years of hiding and of shame didn’t matter because of this moment. This one, perfect moment of love. He forgot what a kiss felt like, and it was so full of euphoria that he wondered why he ever waited to kiss Dean.

The single kiss felt like forever. When they both pulled away, they were both smiling like giddy idiots. Dean could see every flash of blue in Cas’s beautiful, beautiful eyes. Cas was still a little loopy from the kiss and couldn’t help but stare into Dean’s green eyes.

Dean moved his hands to the back of Cas’s neck. Cas put his hands on Dean’s waist. Dean leaned in again and Cas closed the gap. This kiss felt more natural. Cas pulled Dean closer, and Cas’s body felt perfect against Dean’s. 

Cas and Dean stayed with locked lips, parting only when they needed to breathe, for several minutes. Dean’s hands were holding Cas close to him, like Cas was going to disappear any moment.

Cas pulled away. His hands were still on Dean’s neck. Dean looked at him carefully. “Baby, is everything okay?” Dean asked.

“More than okay. Everything is perfect.” Cas said. “I’m just… nervous.”

“Why?” Dean asked.

“I’ve only kissed one other person.” Cas said. “I’m scared that I’m not experienced enough. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to do something wrong.”

“Cas, baby...” Dean said, kissing Cas quickly. “You couldn’t do anything wrong. Just do what feels right to you. Because nothing you could do would ever make me want to leave. And if you want to go slower, just tell me. Tell me if you want anything, ever. I want to make you so happy.”

Cas smiled. “What did I ever do to deserve you?” 

Dean kissed the corner of Cas’s mouth. “You deserve everything and more, baby.”

“Dean, can we just sit and watch the waves?” Cas asked.

Dean nodded and sat down on the sand. He spread his legs out and gave Cas a look that suggested that Cas sit there. Cas sat in between Dean’s legs, his knees curled up to his chest. Dean rested his head on one of Cas’s shoulders and draped an arm over the other shoulder. Cas reached up and held Dean’s hand.

And there they sat. Watching the waves, utterly in love with each other, for hours.


	24. Another Hotel

Dean was back driving the Impala, Cas sitting in the passenger seat. They decided to start driving back east, to throw off the cops a little. 

Cas and Dean were at the beach for hours. The only reason they decided to leave was because it was so cold and both of them were starting to go numb. They left, but not without Dean writing “I KISSED CAS” in the sand.

“Cas, I hope I didn’t go too fast for you today.” Dean said. “I just, I really like you and if the cops do catch up to us I wanted you to know.”

“You didn’t, Dean, I promise.” Cas said. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since the train. I just was afraid you wouldn’t like me.”

“Well don’t be afraid of that any more. I really like you. That’s all that matters.” Dean replied.

“It also kind of matters that we lose the cops that have been on our trail.” Cas said.

“That’s true. But I think that going east will help our case. If we keep going north then we get predictable. We gotta keep the cops on their toes.” Dean said.

Dean and Cas passed a sign that said “Welcome to Idaho!”. 

“Wow, Cas now you can tell people that you have been to Idaho as well as Oregon.” Dean said.

“Yeah,” Cas replied, looking over at Dean. Cas immediately started to smile. There’s no way that a boy like this could be this cute and this thoughtful and still like him. He’s so lucky. So damn lucky.

Dean noticed Cas looking over, adoringly, at him. “Whatcha looking at there, baby?” 

“I just like you so much.” Cas said.

Dean reached over and grabbed Cas’s hand, brought it to his lips and gave it a quick kiss. “I promise to one day give you a million kisses, just not when I’m driving.”

“Yes, please don’t crash.” Cas said. “I feel like dying would ruin the moment.”

The two boys drove in comfortable silence all the way to Boise, Idaho. A few times, Dean swore that he could see cops pass them. Every time he saw a cop car, he would panic a little bit. Now that Dean has Cas to kiss and hold, he didn’t want any cops pulling them apart.

Dean found an old, really rundown motel straight off of the highway. It was crap, more crap than anything he’s stayed at before, but it would work. Cas checked them into a tiny room with only one bed, but this time they didn’t have to argue who would sleep on the floor.

Dean and Cas spent their time watching the tiny TV that came with the room. There was nothing good on the TV at all, so Dean and Cas used the time to catch up on all the physical intimacy they had missed. Dean held one of Cas’s hands while the other held Cas very close to him. Cas was unfamiliar with this much intimacy, but Dean never did anything that remotely made Cas uncomfortable, and Cas liked the affection from a boy he liked so, so much.

Dean was scared of many things that evening. He was scared of the cops, he was scared of his dad, he was scared of being caught, he was scared of planes, but mostly he was scared of losing Cas. But Dean never let that feeling cover him, all while he held Cas as close as he could.

Eventually night fell and Dean and Cas slowly moved to the bed together. When they finally laid down, it was more comfortable. It was more familiar. Rather than trying to repress their feelings, both boys were able to openly express their feelings with each other. Cas laid his head on Dean’s chest and they intertwined their legs and arms and everything else that they could.

Dean was starting to drift to sleep.

“Dean?” Cas asked.

“Yeah?” Dean replied sleepily.

“I know I already asked you this, but I can't stop thinking about it. Do you think that you’ll get caught?” Cas asked.

Dean thought about it and didn’t respond for a moment. When he did, he was sure to hold Cas as close as possible. “I give myself about a 70% chance.” Dean said. He could tell that he didn’t say what Cas wanted to hear. “I think they’ll pursue me for probably another week, and then they’ll start to give up. But that one week is a long time, and they’re cops. They’ve got a better shot at finding me than I do of getting away.”

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“I’ll go with you if you get caught.” Cas replied, looking up at Dean’s face. They both shifted in bed so Cas was holding himself up with one arm, looking directly over Dean. “I swear it, I’ll go to Kansas with you and live with you and Sam. I’ll go anywhere as long as I’m with you.”

“Aw… baby…” Dean said, being cut off by Cas pressing his lips to Dean’s. It felt good and warm and even though it was probably the fiftieth kiss, it still felt as perfect as the first.

“I mean it.” Cas replied.

“I don’t want you to come with me.” Dean said. “My dad… he’ll be so mad. He’ll probably beat me into the dirt. It wouldn’t help if he sees me with a boy. I don’t want you to go through that.”

“But I don’t want to lose you.” Cas said, feeling tears well up in his eyes.

Dean reached up and stroked Cas’s cheek. “I promise you won’t. Even if we get separated, I will find you. I promise. Over anything, I’ll be with you.” Dean leaned up and kissed Cas’s nose.

Cas smiled, though tearfully. Everything he ever wanted was right here, and it was on the verge of being taken away from him. It doesn’t matter what happened in the morning, or tomorrow, or ever because right here, right now, Dean Winchester was with him. 

“Dean?” Cas asked again.

“Yeah, Cas?”

“I feel like there’s something important that I should tell you.”

Dean immediately panicked. “Cas, if you tell me that this was all a joke, I swear to god I will-”

“No! No, nothing like that.” Cas said. “I just wanted to tell you that Cas isn’t really my name, well it’s a nickname.”

“Okay.”

“My full name is Castiel. Castiel Novak.”

“Oh. Castiel. I like that. Castiel.” Dean said. “Do you want me to call you that now?”

“Oh, no. Cas is fine.” Cas replied. “Really only my family calls me Castiel. I just wanted to let you know.

Cas kissed Dean passionately, more so than he ever had before. Dean welcomed Cas’s touch. Cas shifted his weight so he was directly over Dean, laying over his body. “Is this okay?” Cas asked, still a tiny bit scared of doing something wrong.

Dean enjoyed the feeling of having Cas tower over him. “It’s perfect, baby.” 

Cas smiled and leaned down to kiss Dean. When he did, Dean put his hands under Cas’s shirt, right over his hips. Dean’s hands were warm on Cas’s torso, yet Cas still shivered under the touch. Cas came back up from the kiss. Cas put his hands on either side of Dean’s head, holding himself up.

“I never want to leave you.” Cas said. He couldn’t bring himself to say the three words that he desperately wanted to. “I want this night to last forever.”

Dean moved his hands to trace Cas’s back. “We can make it last forever if you want.”

“I really want it to.” 

Dean smiled, and Cas leaned down to kiss his lips again. But this time, Cas didn’t lift himself up for a while.


	25. Grocery Shopping

The morning came after a long night for Dean and Cas. They woke up when the sun started shining into their window.

At first Dean woke up and he groaned and stretched, only remembering that Cas was sleeping in his arms when Cas started to stretch as well. When Dean woke up, he was greeted with Cas’s blue eyes staring at him with adoration.

“Good morning, baby,” Dean said. Cas kissed his lips sleepily. “I had fun last night.” Dean said between Cas’s tired kisses.

Cas just smiled and kept kissing his boyfriend. His wonderful, sweet, amazing boyfriend.

“Where’s all this affection coming from?” Dean said, having to pull back from Cas’s insistent kisses.

Cas’s heart dropped. “I’m so sorry, am I too much? Oh god I screwed up… I’m so sorry.” Cas turned away.

“Oh, baby, no.” Dean said, pulling Cas back to face him. “I’m not upset. I love getting this much affection, believe me I love it so much. I’m just wondering how you’re so affectionate all of a sudden.”

“I don’t know, I just like that I have someone like you and I never want to stop kissing you.” Cas said. “I could do it forever.”

Dean sat up in the bed and Cas sat with him, facing each other. Dean grabbed Cas’s hips and pulled Cas onto his lap. 

“Oh!” Cas said, a little surprised by the movement. “Oh.”

Dean put his hands on Cas’s bare lower back. Cas went down to kiss Dean and Dean gladly accepted, holding Cas even closer and tighter. Cas wound his hands in Dean’s hair.

The pair stayed like that until they couldn’t any longer. 

Dean got up slowly as Cas was still trying to keep Dean in bed.

“Baby, we gotta go somewhere. We gotta go get food.” Dean said. 

“Yeah, okay.” Cas said, finally letting Dean leave the bed. Dean got up and put his shirt back on from where it had fallen on the floor. He touched his neck, ensuring that the blue necklace was still there. When Cas saw that motion, he did the same to his green necklace.

Both boys got dressed and ready for their day out. Dean decided that today they would go to a local grocery store to pick up some food so that they could live on the road for a while. When Cas was ready he went out to the Impala where Dean was already standing.

“Is my baby ready to go?” Dean asked.   


“Yeah sorry it took so long-” Cas replied.

“I meant the car, Cas.” Dean said. Cas gave him a confused expression. “I’m kidding!”

Dean walked to Cas and gave him a quick kiss before opening the passenger side door for him. Cas took a seat and Dean shut the door and went over to the drivers side. He started the car and pulled out of the motel.

Dean found signs that led him to a small but adequate grocery store in the town. He parked the car in the front of the store and locked the doors. “Just in case.” 

Dean and Cas walked into the grocery store and grabbed a cart. They walked around for a while, grabbing things that they figure they’d need on the road. Cas would grab a six pack of his favorite soda, and Dean would grab a bag of his favorite chips. They opted for some healthy options, too. Dean learned that Cas’s favorite fruit was apples, so Dean grabbed a big bag of them to share on the road.

The store was eerily empty. Dean figured it was just because it was early on a weekday, and everyone was either at work or still asleep. But since the store was empty, it allowed Dean and Cas to hear everything that was going on.

While the boys were in the coffee aisle, they could hear two employees gossiping in the next aisle over.

“Do you remember hearing about that one boy from Kansas on the news?” One employee said.

“Yeah, of course.” The other employee replied. Dean looked worryingly at Cas, and both of them slowed their breathing so they would better hear the employees talking.

“Well, apparently he’s here in Boise.” The first employee said.

“Why would some kid want to come to Boise? It’s like the most boring place on the planet.” The other employee responded.

“I think Kansas would qualify as more boring, Chad.” The first employee said.

“True, true.” The employee named Chad said. “Are the police any closer to finding him?”

“I mean they found out what hotel he stayed at last night, and they figured out what car he’s been driving. An Impala, they said.” The first employee said.

Cas looked at Dean. There were tears in his eyes. Dean looked scared, more scared than Cas could have ever imagined him to be.

All of a sudden, there was an announcement over the speakers of the grocery store.

“Could the owner of the black 1967 Chevy Impala please come to the front? The police need to see your ID and registration.”

Dean looked Cas directly in the eye. “We need to leave. Now.”

Cas nodded, and the boys abandoned the cart in the middle of the aisle.

Dean led the way, running through the entire store trying to find some way, any way, out of this store rather than the front entrance. Dean looked through aisle after aisle, finding nothing. 

Dean was about to run down an aisle that seemed to show a back exit through the meat department, but he saw a cop at the end of the aisle. The cop shouted “Dean Winchester!”, so Dean decided to run in the other direction.

“Dean!” Cas said, pointing towards two doors behind the bakery section. “This has to lead out!”

Dean nodded, taking Cas by the hand and pushing through the doors. It was the stock room. There were hundreds of palettes filled with food. The room was cold, and it was a little scarily dark. Cas and Dean found some palettes sitting near the doors and pushed them in front of the doors so no cops could follow them in.

Dean found a source of light in the back of the room and walked towards it, but then he saw cops standing outside the door. The cops couldn’t get in, it must have been locked from the inside. Dean saw another light, this time to the side of the room. Another door! There were no cops standing outside that door.

But Dean made another decision.

“Cas!” Dean said, grabbing his boyfriend’s hands. They were facing each other.

“Come on, Dean. We can make it out that side door-” Cas tried to pull Dean to the door, but Dean stayed standing still. 

“No.” Dean said, tears forming in his eyes.

“What? No, Dean, come on! We can go, we can make it!” Cas said, his heart pounding in his chest.

“They’ll still be coming after me.” Dean said. “The cops won’t stop looking for me. They know which car I’m in. As long as they don’t have me they’ll keep looking.”

“They’ll stop eventually!” Cas said, tearing up as well.

“But how long will it take? Weeks? Months? Years??” Dean said, tears sliding down his cheeks. “I don’t want to make you go through that.”

“I will, I promise I will, Dean.”

“No, Cas. I can’t make you go through that.”

“Please, Dean.” Cas said, sobs strangling his words. “I can’t leave you. I can’t.”

“You have to, baby.” Dean said. He let go of Cas’s hands for a moment to rummage in his pockets. Dean grabbed his wallet and the keys to the car and shoved them in Cas’s hands. “Here, take these.”

“What? Dean-”

“There’s a couple hundred dollars there. It should hold you over for a while. And take the car. You need her more than I do.”

“Dean, please no.” Cas said, his voice sounding weak.

Dean swallowed hard. “I’m turning eighteen in three months. The second I do I’ll leave home and come find you. My dad can’t follow me then. I promise I’ll find you.”

“Dean-” Cas said.

“This is the only way. I don’t like it either. But it is.” Dean said, his face shining with tears. “I’ll go out the back door and get caught. Go out that side door and get to the front. Once you see there are no cops out there, take the car and get out of here as fast as possible. They won’t follow you.”

“I can’t-”

“Yes you can. You can do this, baby, I know it. You have to.” Dean choked on his words. “And whenever you feel lonely, or when you miss me, hold onto this necklace.” Dean said, pointing at the green necklace hanging off of Cas’s neck. “I promise that I’ll come back and find you. That necklace is my promise.”

“I promise I’ll be waiting for you.” Cas said. “And that necklace you’re wearing,” Cas pointed to the identical blue necklace Dean was wearing, “is my promise.”

Dean pulled Cas in for a kiss. It was as long as they could have made it. 

Dean pulled away first. As he was walking to the door where the cops were waiting, he said something he was dying to say for a long time. “I love you, Cas. I promise I’ll find you.”

Cas stayed standing in the exact same place. “I love you too, Dean.”

Dean gave one last look to Cas before opening the door.


	26. Apart

_ Two weeks later. _

Dean got back home to Lawrence two days later. Just as Dean predicted, his dad beat the living hell out of him for leaving. Sadly, it was where Sam was watching.

It’s been two weeks at home. Two horrendously painful weeks. Dean’s dad barely let him leave his room. Which was fine by Dean, because there’s no where Dean even wanted to go.

He didn’t want to go back to school. He didn’t want to get a job. He didn’t want to go outside, or anywhere. Dean just wanted to be with Cas. And it’s the one place he couldn’t be.

Sam would come in and talk to Dean every night. Dean told him all the tales of the places he went, of the towns he saw, and even of Cas. Dean told Sam about how he fell in love with a blue eyed boy, how he got the necklaces and how they kissed on the beach. Dean told Sam about the night in the motel room (without going into too much detail of course), and about the morning at the grocery store and how he had to say goodbye. Dean hold Sam about how he’d never felt that way about another person, and about how he’s never felt this heart broken in his entire life.

“But it’ll be okay right?” Sam asked. “Because you said you’d find him?”

“That’s the thing, Sammy.” Dean said. “There’s a lot of places that he could be. He could go back to the east coast, or he could go to Canada, or anywhere in between. I want to find him, but I’m a little scared that I’m not going to be able to.”

“You will, Dean.” Sam said. “It’s true love. You’re going to find him, you have to!”

“I’m glad you think so, kid.” Dean said. 

***

It had been two weeks since Dean abandoned him and that’s all Cas could think about. 

Cas knew that Dean loved him, but why couldn’t he stay? Why couldn’t he have even tried to run from the law? Why was he so quick to go back?

Cas tried not to think about Dean. He needed to find a place to settle down. A job, a life, a house. Even though Dean gave Cas a lot of money, it’s been running out quickly. A car takes a lot of gas, and food costs money. Cas needed a permanent place to settle down for a while, so that’s what he’s been trying to occupy his mind with.

But Cas couldn’t not think about Dean. About the way Dean smiled and laughed, or about the way he kissed. About the way Dean would drive the car, and that one time he did it while holding Cas’s hand. He couldn’t stop thinking about him, and about the way Cas loved him. His whole mind was just struck by it constantly. It was so painful, the way Cas felt. He felt abandoned, alone, and unloved. So whenever he did, he would just hold onto the little green necklace that he would never, ever take off.

Cas needed to find a place that Dean could find in three months. But where?


	27. Dean's Birthday

Three months had passed since Dean last said goodbye to Cas. Dean laid on his bed, watching the clock in his room with anticipation. He only had four more minutes. Four more minutes in his hell of a house. Four more minutes until Dean turned 18. Four more minutes until he could leave and never have to worry about coming back.

Three minutes. Dean couldn’t wait any more. He got up and looked in his bag again. All of his possessions were in there. Every piece of clothing, every knick knack, even the sheets stripped from his bed. Dean was leaving, and this time he wasn’t coming back.

Two minutes. Dean grabbed the bag and slowly walked it to the front of the house, careful not to make any noise. He loaded it in his car, a car not nearly as pretty as the Impala, and crept back into the house.

One minute. Dean walked into Sam’s room. His brother was sleeping peacefully on the bed. Dean shook Sam awake.

Sam groaned and then opened his eyes. “Dean… what are you doing?” Sam glanced at the clock in his room. “Oh, happy birthday!”

“Thanks, kid.” Dean replied, smiling. “So here’s the thing-”

“Are you running away again?” Sam asked.

“Yeah.” Dean said. “I’m eighteen now so there’s nothing Dad can do about it, and I have to find Cas. Once I find him I promise I’ll write you. And you can come and live with us if you want, I’m sure there will be room.”

“No, it’s okay. I want to finish high school here.” Sam replied. “Plus I’m sure you don’t want your little brother around while you’re with your boyfriend.”

Dean smiled, but still with a sad undertone. “I’m sorry for leaving you again.”

“It’s okay. I get it. As long as you promise to write and we promise to visit each other.” Sam said.

“Of course. I’ll write to you as soon as I find him.” Dean pulled his brother in for a hug. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too.” Sam said. “Now good luck finding Cas.”

Dean closed Sam’s door behind him, his heart feeling heavy. But now it was time for Dean to leave and never have to live here again. Dean held onto the blue necklace he hadn’t taken off in three months. It was time to find Cas.

***

Turns out finding Cas was difficult. Dean started looking in all the places he had been with Cas. The beach where they kissed, near the hotels they stayed. He went up and down and all the way around the Pacific northwest, not finding a single clue.

Dean checked every phonebook he could find. He knocked on every door that might look like a house Cas would live in. He looked for any sign of a black 1967 Chevy Impala parked in front of a house. But nothing came up.

Dean went back the way he came, thinking he missed something that he might catch the second time around. But there was nothing.

Dean talked to the train company, seeing if they maybe had recently employed someone named Castiel Novak. But again, another negative.

Dean was running out of ideas, food, and money. It had been three weeks of living out of his car, and meals were starting to become scarcer and scarcer. Every single waking second was filled with “Where could Cas be?”, and considering Dean didn’t get a lot of sleep, it was a ton of time.

One night, when Dean was sleeping fitfully yet again, he had a dream where he went on a date with Cas. It was in that small town in Colorado they visited and spent a night in. But this time, it wasn’t just a casual hang out filled with repressed feelings, it was a date. They were holding hands under the string of lights and eating pasta Lady and the Tramp style. 

Dean woke up suddenly remembering something.  _ The house by the train tracks _ . 

“Yes!” Dean exclaimed to himself. “Can’t believe I missed that!”

Dean turned his car on and immediately began driving east, a clear destination in his mind of where he needed to be. Where Cas was.


	28. The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What if I made the ending just Dean dying in a car crash? Would they let me write for the show?! Don't worry, I promise I didn't do that. That would be almost unfair to the characters, or something like that.

Three days later, Dean arrived in Colorado. He pulled over to the side of the road and checked the map he had in his car. He saw where the train tracks were, where the small town was, and the stretch of highway between his location and that town. He tore down the highway, flying over the speed limit, trying to get to Cas any faster.

Dean arrived in the town a few hours later. His map wasn’t detailed enough to help him out navigating these streets, so he had to do it himself.

Following the signs, Dean drove himself closer to all the tourist destinations. First it was a museum far away from where he needed, then a historical monument a few miles nearer. The finally, he found the downtown area.

Dean parked his car as soon as he could find a place. He knew he wouldn’t be able to recognize anything just by driving, he had to relive the night in order to get to that house by the tracks.

He started out by finding the pizza place him and Cas ate at. And damn, it smelled so good. 

“ _ Once I find Cas, we’re eating that pizza for the rest of our lives. _ ” Dean thought, smiling to himself. He liked the idea of spending the rest of his life with Cas.

Dean then traced his and Cas’s steps down the sidewalk. He found the store where he purchased the matching necklace sets for him and Cas. Dean held onto his tightly, trying to use it as a signal to where Cas was.

Then Dean crossed the hotel where him and Cas stayed, feeling full of repressed feelings but growing into such close friends. God, Dean missed that. But soon, it could be every night, if he could just find… 

The train tracks!

There they were! Between two buildings, he could see the glimpse of train tracks a few streets down. And there! He could barely make it out, but it was definitely a house. A house right by the train tracks.

Dean sprinted towards the house, crossing streets and apologizing to cars that had to squeal their brakes in order to not collide into Dean.

Dean kept running, his heart pounding and pounding in his chest, and then his throat, and then everywhere. It wasn’t because of the running, it was because of Cas.

Dean finally came to the edge of the house’s property. He stopped running, his breathing heavy. This was the moment he’d been waiting for. Three months of agony and abuse for this. Every worry flooded Dean’s head.

“ _ What if Cas doesn’t live there? What if I screwed up and I spent the last of my money to get to a place where he isn’t? What if it is him but he doesn’t recognize me? What if he found someone else? What if he doesn’t love me anymore? _ ”

Dean shook his head, trying to clear his mind of the thoughts. He knew that even if the door opened and it’s not the Cas he wanted, Dean had to find out. He stepped towards the door slowly.

Dean knocked on the old wooden door three times. The paint was peeling off severely, but it was a nice color. Dean could hear his heart beating louder than anything else. But the sound Dean was hearing wasn’t just his own heartbeat.

There were footsteps moving around inside the house! Were they getting closer? Or was Dean’s heart just on the verge of exploding?

The door creaked open, and Dean immediately recognized the two striking blue eyes standing before him.

It was him. It was Cas.

“Cas!” Dean yelled, forcing the door the rest of the way open and wrapping his arms around Cas.

“Dean!” Cas yelled, embracing Dean back just as tightly. 

Just like that, the pair was reunited, and all was right with the two boys who had met on a train only four months ago, and fallen in love with each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading through all this! I hope this is a satisfying conclusion. If you liked this, stick around my profile for more works! I'm sure I'll be writing a myriad of fix-it fics here soon. Until I see you again, carry on.


End file.
